|
New site? Maybe some day.
|
than adding some ghetto thug to my myspace friends, and then leaving him a pic comment. I'll go to a picture of his infant/toddler son or daughter and then simply say "I'd hit it". The comedy that insues afterwards is absolutely priceless. |
|
hahahaha... thats a great idea. |
|
post some of the emails they send you following such comments |
|
I bet they threaten to 'buck' yo ass.
buck em' buck em' |
|
I'll post some. They're hilarious. These people intentionally spell worse than retarded children. And I mean that literally.
I think my next victim might be "FRANCIS ORTIZ $.BIG PAPI CHULO.$"
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...user.viewprofile&friendid=110778989
I just had to click on this guy's profile after he left some fake spam account (a hot broad who's interested in you... if you're an idiot) a picture comment saying "4 WORDS FOR YU "GOD DAMN YUR FINE" 4 REAL LOOKEN MADD DOPE".
hahahahha I just looked again... he doesn't appear to have any kids but he does have a niece.
|
|
Now I have to think of what to say. I think It'll be something simple along the lines of "Id geT uP in dAt shit... fo reElz" |
|
you could try to sell him one of these...
|
|
they hatin Patrolling they trying to catch me ridin |
|
Books: i hate readin
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA |
|
"holladaddy69" -- it should just be legal to kill some people. |
|
xmikex said: Books: i hate readin
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA |
You know what the funny thing is? I didn't make ANY of that up.
Actually, half way through copying this guy's shit, I find out he grew up in Hanson. No shit. Whiman/Hanson Regional High School. Here his real profile: http://www.myspace.com/cvkid |
|
largefreakatzero said: "holladaddy69" -- it should just be legal to kill some people. |
That's the only part of the profile I made up. He was saying "holla" a lot in his picture captions. |
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menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: largefreakatzero said:"holladaddy69" -- it should just be legal to kill some people. |
That's the only part of the profile I made up. He was saying "holla" a lot in his picture captions. |
Hahaha, I get it -- that was the fake one you made up, sorry I am stupid. But, I have never used "holla" in any situation, so perhaps there is some hope for me. |
|
You should start using "holla" more often. It's very hip! |
|
Some wigger bitch just left me a comment.
aahahahaha I just went to her profile... look at the thing she's fucking.
|
|
haha myspace is so fucking stupid. I just got a friend request from someone named "Jean" yet all her pictures of Kate from http://www.KatesPlayground.com
Let's see the hoof! |
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menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: Some wigger bitch just left me a comment.
aahahahaha I just went to her profile... look at the thing she's fucking.
|
Jesus. Let's go back to my comment about it being legal to kill some people. |
|
I'm all for it if you replace the word "some" with "most". |
|
that guy doesn't deserve to live and the girl should have her twat burned off for fucking him. |
|
you cant put retarted people to death * note the ruling in florida courts for the child killer with an IQ of 60.... no capital punishment for the retarted..... boo hooo....... if you cant strangle your retarted baby at birth with it's own ambilical cord, then who can you choke out? |
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menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: haha myspace is so fucking stupid. I just got a friend request from someone named "Jean" yet all her pictures of Kate from http://www.KatesPlayground.com
Let's see the hoof! |
hahahaah! OBEY THE HOOF! |
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largefreakatzero said: menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:Some wigger bitch just left me a comment.
aahahahaha I just went to her profile... look at the thing she's fucking.
|
Jesus. Let's go back to my comment about it being legal to kill some people. |
I don't see any people. I see a piece of shit with two little slits for eyes, a shitmoustache, and a backwards baseball cap getting ridden by a carnivorous shaved yeti. |
|
"damn girl you fine id swallow yo dick" that is fucking priceless bravo |
|
haha, you saw that, eh?
I just tried fucking with a couple more people. It keeps saying "error" in red at the top of the page. (not a normal myspace error). I think I'm blocked from sending messages at the moment. |
|
I'm waiting to comment on that guy's pictures but he hasn't approved my friend request yet :( |
|
i love the "id love swallow yo dick" and then how it's replied by "ya i get that alot boo" |
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I can't. I don't speak retard. |
|
Oh my, I'd like to see the result that one yields. |
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menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: She just added me... I had to be nice and leave her a comment...
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=167116343 |
hahahha, dangerzone! |
|
I grew up around alot caribbean people. Many of them dress their children like fucking dolls to show off. |
|
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Message from WHORE to ME:
From: ~SNO BUNNII~ I lUv mY pOoP@LoOp
Date: 14 Mar 2007, 21:26
W@Z UP WIITH YOU??? II W@NT3D TO S@Y TH@T YOU LOOL3N S3XII @S H3LL... SO II H@D TO CUM BY @ND S@Y HII =}
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Message from ME to WHORE:
sumthinz wrong wit yo A key on yo keyboard, u fukkin trickass bustah
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
No reponse received |
|
"i'm ain't really lookin fa no niggaz" and i thought my grammer was bad |
|
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: You know what the funny thing is? I didn't make ANY of that up.
Actually, half way through copying this guy's shit, I find out he grew up in Hanson. No shit. Whiman/Hanson Regional High School. Here his real profile: http://www.myspace.com/cvkid |
He lives in White River Junction, VT??? HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!! |
|
haha a new one. This one's name is "FuCkIn WiT mE pAyZ---mEsS aRoUnD n LeAvE yA dAzEd". Her profile fetures bad grammar and pictures of her dressing her 3-year-old son up in gangster clothes.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Bulletin from WHORE:
I wish that i didnt open this too. This is scary cause it works. post this with the name of your school. when ur finished press f6 and ur crushes name will appear on the screen. do it in the next 143 SEC or you will die in 1 hour!!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Message from ME to WHORE:
I hope you get hit by a bus, you dumb fucking slut.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
message from WHORE to ME:
nigga first of all who da fuck u think u tawkin to like dat cuz it sho da fuck aint bout to b me. u dont kno me like et so dont b cumin at me wit dat shyt. if im so fuckin dumb den delete me nicca its dat damn simple. bitch betta get ya mind right. real tawk.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
message from ME to WHORE:
What the fuck is a nicca?
I totally want to fuck your son. |
|
funniest shit i have seen in a while. brilliant. just brilliant! |
|
I'm beginning to think that the movie Idiocracy truly is an accurate depiction of humanity's future. |
|
I just started to develop a scoring system based on the last conversation I had, but 5 minutes into tallying up the score, blood started coming out of my ears, so I stopped....
ratio of mispelled words (4 or more letters in length) to correctly spelled words. ("Nigga" is considered a slang term and is scored as a correctly spelled word):
FuCkIn WiT mE pAyZ---mEsS aRoUnD n LeAvE yA dAzEd's score: 11:7
ratio of mispelled words (3 letters or less) to correctly spelled words. (any figure above 1:20 here may indicate possible brain damage or mental retardation):
FuCkIn WiT mE pAyZ---mEsS aRoUnD n LeAvE yA dAzEd's score: 8:15 |
|
new reply from that bitch:
"wat da fuck r u tawkin about??? ur crazy!! " |
|
that ones score is:
>3 = 3:3
<4 = 3:0 |
|
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:
nigga first of all who da fuck u think u tawkin to like dat cuz it sho da fuck aint bout to b me. u dont kno me like et so dont b cumin at me wit dat shyt. if im so fuckin dumb den delete me nicca its dat damn simple. bitch betta get ya mind right. real tawk.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
message from ME to WHORE:
What the fuck is a nicca?
I totally want to fuck your son. |
LOL! I will never get tired of this...
|
|
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
message from IDIOT:
what mean butta mi bread sexzy
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
message from ME to IDIOT:
Your spelling is almost as bad as my inability to stop stealing cars. |
|
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
message from IDIOT:
what mean butta mi bread sexzy
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
message from ME to IDIOT:
Your spelling is almost as bad as my inability to stop stealing cars. |
HAHA. god i love stereotypes |
|
White biatches be LOVIN the choco-cock, yo. Lil Mynx INDEED mmm hmm |
|
mike BOE is a god among niggers |
|
by far one of the funniest people to ever post on rttp. |
|
This thread just keeps getting better. Please continue torturing wegros. |
|
The best thing about that picture is the ghetto blaster in the right hand. Wow. |
|
dreadkill said: mike BOE is a god among niggers |
I's jUs tRyin 2 kEeps iT reel dAwg
holla
largefreakatzero said: This thread just keeps getting better. Please continue torturing wegros. |
haha, I'm working on some new victims. |
|
this thread is flawless. somebody find me a picture of some Yo Yo so I can make my own profile. |
|
xmikex said: this thread is flawless. somebody find me a picture of some Yo Yo so I can make my own profile. |
Done & done. I just did a google image search on "wigger." The results were amazing. This isn't the best one, I am limited at work to what I can click on. |
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That's a good one. I'm thinking I want to use an actual black guy though. |
|
Nah, the white ones are far more hilarious. |
|
largefreakatzero said: Nah, the white ones are far more hilarious. |
haha I can always just change it from a white guy to a black guy and nobody on my friends list will notice |
|
this fucking sTuPiD typing style is taking me forever |
|
ahahahahaha "curvy curve curve curves" |
|
Books: yO rEaD Ma DiCk In Yo MoUtH B1tCh!
haha classic |
|
xmikex said:
the poetic justice made me laugh so fucking hard man |
|
This girl didn't respond as violently as I'd hoped.
Whore's name:
"SAMMiE F BABY *ifuqqing LOVE striipER\'s*"
Whore's photo:
Whore's photo caption:
iLiKE iT NASTY PLS DONT KEEP iT CLASSY BABY.myspace jump0ff
My photo comment:
dAm guRl.. Ill bustatruggalo aLl oVa ya trickass whore facE111!
Whore's reply:
i\'aint no WHORE face
Again... a picture of me looking totally fucking fly
HOLLA |
|
Bahh.. the girls aren't fun to fuck with. I'm gonna stick to making homosexual remarks towards the fucking gangster guys and their pre-teen children.
Whore's Name:
U KNOW ITS HARD TO GET U OUT MY SYSTEM
Whore's photo:
Spam bulletin message that WHORE posted:
Subject: FREE CONDOMS HERE!
Body: 1 1Hi my friend ROB said we can get free condoms here!! I got mine took me 2 mins if that .Thought i would share as you are on my friend list :-)Free Condoms here
My reponse:
loOks lIke tHa fRee coNDoms caim 2 laTe. They's not guNna maKe yo welfair babY go awaaay now, u trickazz bUstah
holla
Whore's response:
WAT THE HELL |
|
HAHAHAH its threads like these that make people in my house look at me funny cause i laugh really loud all of a sudden |
|
HAHAHAH. trickazz bustah. |
|
They's not guNna maKe yo welfair babY go awaaay now, u trickazz bUstah
i can't stop laughing at this right now |
|
I just left xmikex some picture comments. |
|
This thread is gonna get me fired. |
|
I can't even look at that shirtless black guy anymore without laughing.
YEAH
WUTT
OKAYYYYYY |
|
xmikex said: This thread is gonna get me fired. |
speaking of getting fired... i just found out i'm losing my job.
|
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xmikex said: This thread is gonna get me fired. |
How so? If they catch you doing it at work, you mean? |
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FuckIsMySignature said: xmikex said:This thread is gonna get me fired. |
speaking of getting fired... i just found out i'm losing my job.
|
How come? Because of this thread? |
|
Call your boss a trickazz bustah and he'll rehire you instantly. |
|
no i've been temping for this company for 5 months and they kept telling me they were gonna hire me permanently but instead they are hiring someone else...despite the fact that i've busted my ass for this place. lesson learned: never try. |
|
"Trying is the first step towards failure."
-Homer Jay Simpson |
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menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: "Trying is the first step towards failure."
-Homer Jay Simpson |
I've lived by that ideology since I first heard it.
|
|
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: xmikex said:This thread is gonna get me fired. |
How so? If they catch you doing it at work, you mean? |
Because I can't stop laughing. There's only so many times you can cover up an outburst of laughter with a cough before it loses its plausibility. |
|
Being out of work sucks... looks like i'm gonna have to get into drug dealing. I hear cocaine is where the $$ is at. |
|
xmikex said: Because I can't stop laughing. There's only so many times you can cover up an outburst of laughter with a cough before it loses its plausibility. |
haha oh yeah. When I do it everybody probably just assumes I'm masturbating again. |
|
I just rode in an elevator with a black girl.
It's official: I can't even look at black people anymore without laughing. |
|
"I have some jokes about how black people are different from white people...
For instance-
White people have names like Lenny, while black people have names like Carl." |
|
i can't stop laughing at that profile |
|
"Th3y C@ll Me NoNFiCtIoN Cuzz I'M AlWayZZ LYin!"
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA |
|
FuckIsMySignature said: "Th3y C@ll Me NoNFiCtIoN Cuzz I'M AlWayZZ LYin!"
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA |
That's from a story my roomate told me. He was in a book store and some pack of yo-yos came rolling in. One of them said "Yo check out this new line I just came up with: They Call me non-fiction cuz I'm always lyin, the call me non-fiction cuz I'm always lyin!" After he said it 500 more times his friends tried to convince him that non-fiction means events that actually happened. But he wasn't tryn ta hear dat shit. |
|
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: Bahh.. the girls aren't fun to fuck with. I'm gonna stick to making homosexual remarks towards the fucking gangster guys and their pre-teen children.
Whore's Name:
U KNOW ITS HARD TO GET U OUT MY SYSTEM
Whore's photo:
Spam bulletin message that WHORE posted:
Subject: FREE CONDOMS HERE!
Body: 1 1Hi my friend ROB said we can get free condoms here!! I got mine took me 2 mins if that .Thought i would share as you are on my friend list :-)Free Condoms here
My reponse:
loOks lIke tHa fRee coNDoms caim 2 laTe. They's not guNna maKe yo welfair babY go awaaay now, u trickazz bUstah
holla
Whore's response:
WAT THE HELL |
I still can't even think about that picture without laughing. |
|
xmikex said: FuckIsMySignature said:"Th3y C@ll Me NoNFiCtIoN Cuzz I'M AlWayZZ LYin!"
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA |
That's from a story my roomate told me. He was in a book store and some pack of yo-yos came rolling in. One of them said "Yo check out this new line I just came up with: They Call me non-fiction cuz I'm always lyin, the call me non-fiction cuz I'm always lyin!" After he said it 500 more times his friends tried to convince him that non-fiction means events that actually happened. But he wasn't tryn ta hear dat shit. |
That makes it so much better. |
|
the irony bleeds from that like a stuck pig. |
|
every time i think about this thread, i start laughing. this thread is the bright spot in my life. |
|
dreadkill said: every time i think about this thread, i start laughing. this thread is the bright spot in my life. |
your life must be a black hole then.
|
|
FuckIsMySignature said:
|
|
comment left from P-Qwan
"BlINg bLING blaNG! yO sOrrY tA hEaR bOuT yO bIkE SoN. DaT $h1t'S RoUgh. eY mAyBe Ya'Ll coULd boRrOw mInE Iz jUsT gUt A nEw OnE lIkE youwrzz. Lol! " |
|
and my reply...
h0w b0wt $uK ma pH@t pR1cK Yo g@nG$TA d00$h pHaGgoTt%?!?
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
aAnd yo MAma wuz A tR1cKa$$ cRacKa s0n |
|
Man, this is a true study in anthropology. All these black people just go ahead and add me like nothing's going on. Every single one of their profiles says the exact same shit. It's absolutely amazing. I've been sending friends of mine messages just to mess with them. Everybody's too sketched out to reply. One of my friends e-mailed my girlfriend to ask "Who the fuck is this P-Qwan guy?! And what's his fucking problem?"
Of course that didn't sit too well with da P. You can't insult a brotha's honor like that. |
|
anonymous said:
DAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYM |
|
'DIS BE ME BITCHAZZ BUSTIN' WIF MUH RIDE. |
|
She bought that with 70,000 Newport proofs of purchase |
|
And a separate loan for the rims. |
|
What are you talking about?... cocaine bought that whip. |
|
largefreakatzero said: And a separate loan for the rims. |
DEM SHITZ SPIN, SON! |
|
xmikex said: She bought that with 70,000 Newport proofs of purchase |
excellent |
|
"trickazz bUstah" now pops into my head at random times during the day. |
|
Dey spinnin negga dey spinnin |
|
largefreakatzero said: "trickazz bUstah" now pops into my head at random times during the day. |
i can't stop thinking about it or saying it. i have been calling everyone i know a trickazz bustah for days. |
|
I'm glad I was able to influence you all that much. Does this mean you'll all buy my rap CD? |
|
keep posting more comments you leave for these people. i love reading them. |
|
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: I'm glad I was able to influence you all that much. Does this mean you'll all buy my rap CD? |
mOs DeF yO. |
|
hahahahahahahahahaahahah.....
I found this guy:
Name: Jacob Bebko
My message to him:
"nigga, you ainforeel trickazz bustah"
His reponse:
"What do you mean not real ? I never said anything about you...
I added you cause I respect you."
aaaaaaaahahahahahahahahaha why the fuck would he respect my fake profile? |
|
YO I GOTZ MAD RESPEX 4 U NIGGA
WTF IZ UP WIT U |
|
Random weird conversation in which I try to make no sense whatsoever.
Message from whore to me:
you get krump
Message from me to whore:
imma krumpin yo badonkadonk illa hizzy gurl!
Message from whore to me:
oh b-cuz we got a krump krew and we do need some help we just now started so we got a lil people
Message from me to whore:
You'z nuttin but a trickazz bustah
holla
Message from whore to me:
NAW NOT ME YOU MUST BE COMMPLAMENTIN YASELF
Message from me to whore:
HOLLA |
|
check out mah grizz fo rizz yo
fucking niggers |
|
i love this thread more than anything else in the world |
|
This thread is fuckin' funny....I love you MSD. |
|
Fat ghetto broads make me want to puke out diarrhea-esque vomit. All that comes to mind when I see one of them welfare-whores are those Jerry Springer episodes:
"Darnel.......you are not the father of Shaniqua's baby" |
|
Name:
~*$hOrTy D*~
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...6a24e22-ff71-411f-bdb7-079dbdbe4160
Picture I commented on:
My comment on her picture:
"Fuck ya, dat kidz Is lookin sExxy fo'reelreelz. I can see'z doze tatties dere. Imma suck on dem fuckerz fo'reelreelz.
Da gurl on the right lookz like a gump-ass fuckin' busta.
holla"
Her response to me:
"Wat?
for real? thats kinda fucked up!" |
|
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: Bahh.. the girls aren't fun to fuck with. I'm gonna stick to making homosexual remarks towards the fucking gangster guys and their pre-teen children.
Whore's Name:
U KNOW ITS HARD TO GET U OUT MY SYSTEM
Whore's photo:
Spam bulletin message that WHORE posted:
Subject: FREE CONDOMS HERE!
Body: 1 1Hi my friend ROB said we can get free condoms here!! I got mine took me 2 mins if that .Thought i would share as you are on my friend list :-)Free Condoms here
My reponse:
loOks lIke tHa fRee coNDoms caim 2 laTe. They's not guNna maKe yo welfair babY go awaaay now, u trickazz bUstah
holla
Whore's response:
WAT THE HELL |
hahahahahahahahaha.
funniest thing I've read in a long time. Good for you. |
|
i just gotta say i too am loving this thread, it's just about my favorite thing on the net right now |
|
My profile's not quite ill enough to mess with other people yet. But that hasn't stopped me from messing with my friends.
From Me to my guitarist:
From: P-Qwan
Subject: Ey Yo
Body: Yo son, yo didt I see yall at a party on St patRicKz day? Yall stepped on my Dunks but its aight cuz I heardz you wuz Boyz wit my homeslice Chip. Uthawize I'd whoop yo ass. Yo giT at me sumTime. holla holla hOllA holLa HOllA
When he didn't answer, but instead asked my girlfriend who "P-Qwan" was I sent this:
From: P-Qwan
Subject: bItcAzz NigGa
Body: yOu tAlKin sHit yoU bItchaZ bustA jIveA$$ sucKa fo0l?! yoU gonNa c@tcH thA gHettO sMasH B. For reAlly ReElz.
AiiiiiGHT!?
This was sent to one of my girlfriend's friends
From: P-Qwan
Subject: ey yo baby
Body: Wud up babiegurl. I thinK you kinda flyy. You n yA dawg n shit. yO, I culd be yo dawg too. nahh mean? gImmie yo digits B. hollA at Ya bOy.
-P ta tha Q aND ya DoN't StoP
She was too sketched to write back. So the P had to step up his game a little.... the only way he knows how
From: P-Qwan
Subject: yo fah real
Body: yall ain't even guNna saY nuthin. dayyym gurlL. I s33n yalL aT goVamint centa yessday. youz Lookin fLY as sh1t. lEmme holLa aT ya. DonT mAke da P git pErsonal yall.
fah reall reallz.
holla.
And finally this one which is in regards to a joke between myself and a friend of mine about black people stealing Subway coupons.
From: P-Qwan
Subject: YO NIGGA I SMELL SUBWAY ON YO BREATH
Body: Wut iT is hoMie. I heArD yoU guT dA rebAte soN! DaT 3 fiddY aNd a FrEe pAcK uh SuN ChIps iZ MyNe yoU trIckAs$ bUsta. GimMie daT sh1t so'S I caN giT mY fRenCh OnIoN on FOOl!
- P-QwillA Da Bu$tAh KiLlaH
not quite up to par with Mike yet, but I'll get there.
|
|
Name:
ri my b3s fri3nd t33
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...=user.viewprofile&friendID=25275018
Photo I commented on:
Her Photo Caption:
"THIS HOW I ROLL ...CUHZ..."
My photo comment (requires approval):
"Imma cut off ya mustash ya gumpass trick ho"
She promptly denied the comment approval and removed me from her friends list.
I then added her back.
She then denied the friend request and sent me this message:
"ur gonna talk shit n then request me as a friend lol"
My reply:
"Thas jus howz I rollz u trickass captaincrunch bustah!" |
|
demondave said:
Ha ha ha... that's pretty much all I think about whenever I look at this thread. |
|
The one thing I've learned from this whole experience is that you can say pretty much anything to a black person and get away with it if you close with HOLLA. |
|
i am having a very difficult time reading that mumbo-jumbo. my brain cant seem to grasp it. |
|
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: Name:
~*$hOrTy D*~
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...6a24e22-ff71-411f-bdb7-079dbdbe4160
Picture I commented on:
My comment on her picture:
"Fuck ya, dat kidz Is lookin sExxy fo'reelreelz. I can see'z doze tatties dere. Imma suck on dem fuckerz fo'reelreelz.
Da gurl on the right lookz like a gump-ass fuckin' busta.
holla"
Her response to me:
"Wat?
for real? thats kinda fucked up!" |
she said kinda fucked up?
maybe she's one of those nut jobs that would let you
gross bitch |
|
"xmikex you're not the father" |
|
i can't wait for the world to end |
|
Romero is my fucking home nugget.
I seriously had no idea that guy was even still on the air. And the Maury Povich video is the funniest thing ever. |
|
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: "Thas jus howz I rollz u trickass captaincrunch bustah!" |
LMAO!!
|
|
This may be the greatest thread ever. |
|
Read Bulletin
From: ! DaH NiGgUh U CaN TaKe HoMe 2 Ya PaReNtS !
Date: Mar 13, 2007 5:39 PM
Subject holla, yo
Body: wassup niggaz, Imma shove mah fist up mah azz
|
|
pam said: This may be the greatest thread ever. |
diffaly dude diffaly |
|
Samantha said: menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:"Thas jus howz I rollz u trickass captaincrunch bustah!" |
LMAO!!
|
i laughed so hard at that |
|
I feel sorry for that tattoo artist. |
|
i am envious of that tattoo artist |
|
i cant stop looking at it ^... its like a real bad car accident. |
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xanonymousx said: http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=160822588
lolz |
Yo nicca I want Cobra Commander's face tattooed 'cross my huge a$$. D y'alL take WIC checks? |
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Random picture comment with no response:
Name:
Ashy
Photo I commented on:
My comment:
"ULOOK DUMB YOU FUCKINT TRICKAZZ BUSTAH" |
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MSD gets my vote for the funniest bastard on here. Keep em' coming, I'm loving this. My favorite still is the one about condoms not getting rid of the broads welfare baby. |
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Name:
♥MeL-oDy JoYcE-LyN
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...=user.viewprofile&friendid=13723291
Photo:
My message to her:
Subject: GASTOWN!
Body: "YO BITCH IMMA CHUNDER U LIKE PHUCKIN SCARECROW TEETH
HOLLA!!!!!!"
Her response:
"Not a bitch unless you make me one And what is that suppose to mean??"
My follow-up:
"BITCH U BEST NOT BE STEPIN 2 ME CUZ IMMA FUCKIN FUCK U IN YA GUMPAZZ FACE
HOLLATRON" |
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Name:
Nick Aka "The Kid" ((( F.resh B.oyz I.nc
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...n=user.viewprofile&friendid=4022466
Photo:
Message I sent:
"Yo.. sup dawg. u dont no me, but u lookz like an aight nicca 2 me. u think u cood help a bruTha out an hide a kniffe for me?"
I could then see that he read the message without responding, so I sent another one:
"aiight fine.. read but dontz respond. u beetah watch yo fuckin bak cuz u or youz family culd be next... downass tipgaggah" |
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dreadkill said: i love this thread more than anything else in the world |
ditto that.
|
|
this is sooo hilarious.
i cannot stop laughing. |
|
MSD 231 friends already man people really don't care/ know who they add this is proof. |
|
I'm still warming up. Here's my first comment.
The girl:
The comment:
ey y0 gurlieGUrl. lo0k aT yaLl lOokin lIke A h0t aIr baLlo0n fUll aH l0ve. g0 oN wiT yA bAd s3lf. iF I wuZ deRe riGht Now u an Ya m0mz wuLd g3t sPunKdaFied yaLlzz. JeSus wuZ bLack. h0lla fo ChrIst yaLL YEAH |
|
Hands down the funniest thread I've read here. |
|
The girl:
The message:
Yo wUts uP yoU bustaH ass busTah a$s BustAh. Ya'Ll thInk yA fo realz? Ya'll ain't shit. yOu gimmie a shot and imma pop dat coochie lIke it ain't no Thang you skAnka$$ tricK bitch.
- P Qwan tha HOLLA-nator
HOLLA GIRL! |
|
BUUUUAHHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHHA.....I can't stop laughing....HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA |
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xmikex said: The girl:
The message:
Yo wUts uP yoU bustaH ass busTah a$s BustAh. Ya'Ll thInk yA fo realz? Ya'll ain't shit. yOu gimmie a shot and imma pop dat coochie lIke it ain't no Thang you skAnka$$ tricK bitch.
- P Qwan tha HOLLA-nator
HOLLA GIRL! |
haahaha, any response yet? Them getting pissed off is the best part. I have one brewing at the moment where the girl's getting all pissed. I want to wait till we're done exchanging insults, though, before I post it. |
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xanonymousx said: MSD 231 friends already man people really don't care/ know who they add this is proof. |
I know, it's fucking ridiculous. I added about 15 people in the beginning. I haven't added a single friend after that. 216 of those 231 people all foolishly requested me. |
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menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:
|
|
I did the nonsense scarecrow line to another weirdo....
Name:
1M0R3 D@Y FOR MY CD@Y?Y3SS[[L@DY_P-NIC3
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...n=user.viewprofile&friendid=5077125
Photo:
My message to her:
"YO BITCH IMMA CHUNDER U LIKE PHUCKIN SCARECROW TEETH
HOLLA!!!!!!"
Her response:
"BITCH?? OH HELL NAW WHO THE FUCC IS U NIGGA DON'T COME N MY BOX DISRESPECTIN ME LIKE THAT..N I D0NT KN0W U NIGGA HELL NAW"
My response:
"THAS RIGHT.. BIATCH. imma fuckin pull that ugly azz wig off yo head and skull fuck u and yo family
dedbaby milkshakez n shit nawmeen? u be fuckin upsydown n insideout on da front of mah escalade, fuckin 2dolla dumpstah ho
holla mazel tov"
Now she's not accepting my friend requests :( |
|
hahahahahahaha, "holla mazel tov" |
|
bbbwwwwaaaahahahahahahaha!
|
|
holy fucking butter teeth
|
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menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:
fuckin 2dolla dumpstah ho
holla mazel tov"
|
LMFAO. I just woke up and the first thing i did was check this thread.
This thread is epic!
|
|
Name:
PhillyThugGansta: 2NeVa LeAvE U My AnGeL4
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...14a38ae-9242-4125-b941-44eaddeb96da
Main Photo (NOTE: THIS IS A WOMEN):
Photo caption:
"G I AM FRESH 2 DEATH LOL"
Bulletin SHE posted:
"IF N E MEN HAD EVA DISRESPECT A LADY & IT COULD B UR MOM ESPECIALLY, ETC. ALL FEMALES P.T.G WILL KICK UR AZZ SO A MSG 2 ERR 1 LADIES: DUN BAK DOWN 4 NO BULLSHIT & MEN: KEEP UR MOM, AUNTY & GRAND MA SAFE U DIGG, "G UP" WHEN U HAVE 2"
My response:
"P1ckz up a fuckin book, yo gump ass bitch. u best not step to mah hood in compton. we fuckin string up ya cunt niggah azz.
fo'reelreelz"
Her response:
"YO DUMB FUK WDF R U TALKIN BOUT?"
Me:
u herd me... BIATCH
Her:
I STICK MY GAP N UR MOUTH PUSSY SO Y R U BRING DRAMA FUCKIN PUSSY
Me:
ALL FUCKIN TALK BIATCH.. I BETCHU WULDNT NEVA STEP 2 ME IN COMPTON.. TRICKAZZ BITCH
Her:
BET U'LL NEVA STEP N PHILLY I GO YOUNG GUNZ ON UR AZZ U SHITY AZZ
Me:
ILL RAPE YO HOLE FAMILY N LEAVE EVERBODY U CAREZ ABOUT DEAD WIT DICKHOLEZ IN THEY EYES |
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yesssssss
you managed to fit RAPE in there
hahaha |
|
AAAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAAHAHA you can't make this shit up. Who's fucking stranger? Me for saying all this fucked up shit, or her going along with it?
Name:
~*~*~To DaMn FulL oF rEsEnTmEnT~*~*~
Age:
17
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...afea7c7-85f6-4c42-b722-0f46a9dc4934
Photo:
Her message to me:
hey sexc wats up withu
My reply:
nuttin much gurl.. just gettin' mah stroke on 2 sum of youz pictares imaginin dat u iz 6 years yunger, u here?
Her:
oh reallly im horny too
Me:
datz right gurl.. talk 2 daddy like youz in 5th grade. I be da teacha.
u wanna learn bout christufa columbes, biatch? why dont uu jump on deez nuts rightere
Her:
make me wet first mister columbes
Me:
gurl... i comes up 2 yo desk afta class. i sit at da edge an watch u fo a minut doin ya werk so hard. i can see yo flat preteen cheast thru da top of ya shirt.
I gently push away yo books and direct yo chin up towads me with my finga.
u look buuteful. u noticee me start 2 get haard as i look at yo braces
Her:
thx mir c i feel my pussy geting wet and my underwear geting wet through my short lil skirt i start to rub ur dick through ur pants
Me:
ooo ya, daddy likez. as u keep rubben mah dick u take yo utha hand n start touchin mah neck. u rub ya hand all ova mah THUGLIFE tatto on mah back.
den, I gently reach down adn tuch ya wet skirt. I reach in and stick a finga in ya hawt surprisingley unvirgin 11yaer old box. I den take mah utha hand an start slippin off yur spungebob squarpants shirt n then unbotton ur traininbra
Her:
starts to play with mu swollen clit and starts to play with ur pants zipper
Me:
ooooo thas nice gurl. I start 2 get even harda as i starrt 2 think about da holocaust.
u unzip mah pants and pull out mah gigantic memba. i gently leen ova suck on ya little undredevelopd titties as i thinnk about how hawt u must'v been when u was 6 or 7
Her:
i wipp out ur dick and play with ur balls and start to gentalyy stroke ur hard long wide cock
Me:
ohhhhh yah gurl... that feelz fuckin nice. I take u an bend u ova ya desk an gently stick mah dick in ur tite little 11 year old box. u bleed a littel but its ok. u mone as i thrust gentley in u. youz in pure heaven.
suddenley another gurl enterz da classroom. shez a little yunger. in 3rd grade. we both stop, surprisedd, but u beg me to keeep goin. i tell u dat ill only keep goin if u do sumthin fo me. I ask da yunger girl to come closer and get close 2 u. i ask u 2 kiss her for me an get crazay, den ill keep fuckin u, an show levels uf pleasare u only imagined gurl. what do u do next 2 da gurl?
Her:
i call her over and reach under her skirt and start to play with her i can feel her getting wet
Me:
oooo dats hawt. i start to stroke mahself as i watch da 2 of u gettin it on. i tink to mah self dat if my boss were 2 cum in, id go 2 prison againz fo shure.
i bring da 2 of u closer 2 me. i gently put mah dick back in yo box agian as i start 2 lick & kiss da 8 yearr old girl's titties. i bite down hard and tear off 1 of her nipples. she screams. a littel bit uf blood gently tickles da small of ya back as i get moore turnd on and fuck u evin hardar. u moan in eckstasy
Her:
mmmmmmmmmm mr c dont stop i rub my clit as u pound ur dick in me stretching out my lil pussy i feel u deep in side me and it feel so damn good i feel u coming in me its so warm ur just filling me up my pussy turns hot red
Me:
ohhh yeah biatch.... i fuckin u harder den eva befor. ur startin to scream loudley in eckstasee. i grab 1 of ur pencils on ur desk an start carvin love notez into ur back. da blood runs down ur smokin ass and down ur legs as i continu 2 pull in an out of u. i take out da scissers out of ur mylittlepony bookbag an start cuttin ur hair off as i keep fuckin u.
Her:
ouch i screamthat hurts i pull away and look at the blood
Me:
imm sorry gurl.. i thot u liked to playz ruff. I calm u dawn and reassur u. i gently bring u closer n kiss u on yo neck. when u gets more relaxed, i take ma finger and rub yo clit a little, before inserting my dick again. oh yaa gurl.. u tight. i look down on u as u calm down and starrt 2 smile again as i pump in an out. u starrt 2 moan.
Her:
fuck me harder and harder u cumm in my hot pussy u pump in and out the cumm starts to squrt out my pusyy under ur dick i lick it uup
Me:
ohhhh yeah guuurl. i cringe as i cum in u so haard. just as u start 2 cum, i takez out mah blade and slash it across yo windpipe. u fall lifeless 2 tha floor as i beat mah chest and chant "THUG LIFE!" wavin mah blade around. u twitch on da floor as mah cum poors out of u like mayonaise cummin out of a mailbox. i grab da nippleless 8 year old and start fuckin her hard in da ass.
ur lifeless eyes stare across da room. tha thought of u layin dere makes me harrd as a rock and i fuck ur 3rd grade friend like shez never been fucked befo'
Her:
ummmm ur turning mme off
Me:
hush down gurrl... da dead cant talk. plus, i'z tryin 2 get mah mack on.
i keep fuckin foneesha (da 8 year old) as i put a finger in ur lifeless ass. dam gurl.. ur ass is TIGHT. i put down foneesha and get behind u.
i gently insert mah dick in yo ass as u lay stumick to da floor wit yo ass in da air. oh ya gurl. dats tight. i thrust in an out while i works on mah 2nd nut.
Her:
no i quit
Me:
aww cmon girl, we was just gettin started.
i continu fuckin u as i feel rigormortis set in. TIGHT. foneesha is tryin to get up but is slippin aroun in da blood. i clench yo asscheeks wit my hands as i continu poundin away. i take a fist and beat mah cheast like im king of da jungle. "THUG LIFE! THUG LIFE!"
Her:
on the real ur scaring me
Me:
thas jus how i roll gurl. u liked it in da beginnin. i's like a pirate, thas all. ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!
Her:
yah but u talking about killing and biting nipples of thats freaky
Me:
gurl.. i'z just freaky like dat. u know u likez it. a little blud neva hurt nobody.
do u havez a yunga sista? maybe we can all getz freaky 2getha
Her:
ummm bye
Me:
cmon gurl, dont be'z like dat. u nuthin but a trickazz busta. |
|
Dickholez in they Eyes! priceless. |
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OMG! You should be on perverted-justice.com. LOL! |
|
i feelz mah self gettin hard as i be thinkn bout da holocaust!
you my friend, are a fucking genious! hahahahaha |
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MSD
that could be a cop tryin to bust your ass lol
shes 17 but if shes talkin to you like that in the beginning then shes asking for it. |
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I took that into consideration. I did nothing wrong. |
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Actually I was talking to a friend saying a cop wouldn't go through that much shit for nothing.
Is a cop really going to stand in front of a judge and have a conversation like this?
Judge: So officer Jones, is that when you said "make me wet first mister columbes"?
Officer Jones: Yes sir, that's right. |
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dude this thread has made me laugh so fucking hard the i get hard thinking about the holocaust was fucking awsome |
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HAHAHA How the fuck have I not been all over this thread?
I'm making one when I get home from body farm practice. |
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dead with dickholes in their eyes. This thread will never, ever get old to me. |
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WOW.
I cant believe it took me this long to realize the majesty that is this thread!!!
MSD is a true god of the Internets. |
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succubus said: menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:Name:
~*$hOrTy D*~
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...6a24e22-ff71-411f-bdb7-079dbdbe4160
Picture I commented on:
My comment on her picture:
"Fuck ya, dat kidz Is lookin sExxy fo'reelreelz. I can see'z doze tatties dere. Imma suck on dem fuckerz fo'reelreelz.
Da gurl on the right lookz like a gump-ass fuckin' busta.
holla"
Her response to me:
"Wat?
for real? thats kinda fucked up!" |
she said kinda fucked up?
maybe she's one of those nut jobs that would let you
gross bitch |
This girl's headline is: "Bitch stop tryna impress me tellin me wat color his boxers are... sweetie, i know i bought em...tellin me how good he is in bed...bitch i taught him!!"
Ha ha ha! That is so classy. |
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Not black... I don't think.... but I still think this girl is a bonehead.
The girl:
The message:
Subject: ey yo BabieGurl
Body: ey yo baby yo baby yo. Lemme fist dat shit you nasty ass trick. Imma busta ma tartar sauce all ova yo FredDy Kruger lookin d0me yA heARD?! LOL. On tha realz, da P wants summa dat so why don yall lemme holla at ya. don'T make ya bOy haftah choke a bitch. peace out yall skankass guzzla.
HOLLA YALL!
Read. No response |
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yo, i beats my chest, THUG LIFE! THUG LIFE!
this thread is fucking GOLD. i almost threw up from laughing at the scarecrow teeth bit |
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i just finished a midterm rewrite. i'm now going to get higher-than-the-dickens and read this thread top-to-bottom. hopefully i won't die of a coronary or some such ailment. |
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Thank you, kind sirs.
xmikex said: peace out yall skankass guzzla. |
aaaahahahah, "skankass guzzla" |
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MESSAGE FROM THIS KID TO ME (in reference to my Maury Povich "Not the Father" video on my page):
rom: It's my time
Date: Mar 24, 2007 12:20 PM
yo, is that u in the video?
MY RESPONSE
From: P-Qwan
Date: Mar 24, 2007 5:58 PM
ey Yo man I wish. I wish fo once one a dem blood tests wuld come back neggative. I hads like eight ah dem alrudy day all say days mine. Dang man sumtimez I feel like drownin them little bitchass rugrats and they mamas. Wipin dey noses all ova my fly ass threads amd shit. u Feelin me dawg?
HIS REPLY
Body: lol...i hear you. |
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"dedbaby milkshakez n shit nawmeen?"
i want to make love to you after that one. HAHAHHA!!! |
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this has to be the funniest shit on here !!!!!!! |
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TheFilthyFrenchman said:
hahaha I still have to use this one. |
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menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:
Me:
I start 2 get even harda as i starrt 2 think about da holocaust.
|
One of the funniest things I have ever read! |
|
Holla Daddy & P-Qwan should collaborate on a rap song. |
|
Best comment ever:
"eh yo wazZup gurl, iZ get up in yo aStroNaUt cAr yo dig? hit me up if yoz in Compton
mistah HOLLAnd's opus" |
|
hahaha
I'm going to get fired. |
|
I'm waiting to get bitched at for leaving the comment I left you.
"Yo, bitch watchu tryina play?!" |
|
All my bulletins are about FREE CONDOMS. So I made a bulletin of my own. It took me 15 minutes to type it at work because I couldn't stop laughing.
Subject yO lemMe git at sum free Ciz-ondoms
Body: im doWn fo tha hookUp on some free azz ciz-ondoms ta keeP ma spah-ziz-erm frum sPillin all ovaz some trickz snuh-ziz-atch ya'lL. LOl. On da realz I don woN no mo kIdz. My last babymomma done left heR babY on da Red line, an she ainT neva found iT. oh welll, plenny mo where daT came frum Nawww MEAN?? LOL.
hOlLa!
|
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Nothing makes me laugh more than watching Airplane! followed by Kentucky Fried movie followed by Top Secret! If watching these movies either 2 in a row, or just one of them doesn't make your stomach hurt from laughing there is seriously something wrong with you. |
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Chris_From_Shit_Fuck said: Nothing makes me laugh more than watching Airplane! followed by Kentucky Fried movie followed by Top Secret! If watching these movies either 2 in a row, or just one of them doesn't make your stomach hurt from laughing there is seriously something wrong with you. |
Apparently, this trick ass mark is in the wrong thread!
Fo Realrealz. |
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powerkok said: Chris_From_Shit_Fuck said:Nothing makes me laugh more than watching Airplane! followed by Kentucky Fried movie followed by Top Secret! If watching these movies either 2 in a row, or just one of them doesn't make your stomach hurt from laughing there is seriously something wrong with you. |
Apparently, this trick ass mark is in the wrong thread!
Fo Realrealz. |
Holla. |
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wow, that is fucking brutal. i would be careful, even as a joke that shit could have drastic consequences. if the wrong person were to see a sex conversation about 3rd graders, it would go over like a fart in church. |
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Granny_Monster said: Best comment ever:
"eh yo wazZup gurl, iZ get up in yo aStroNaUt cAr yo dig? hit me up if yoz in Compton
mistah HOLLAnd's opus" |
that's one of the funniest things i've ever read. |
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Granny_Monster said: I'm waiting to get bitched at for leaving the comment I left you. |
"Thats a hawt jam right thurrrrr.
Ya hurd?"
ahahaha |
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powerkok said: this trick ass mark is in the wrong thread!
Fo Realrealz. |
xmikex said:
Mess said:
aaaaahahahahaha
I gotta write all this shizazzle down for material.
mos def, sun |
|
"yo so me ronny and boo boo was chillin on the stoop when like six dudes came out the cut wit they nina's blazin son. Ronny hit da flo but his back was toe up from dem mack millies son. Boo boo got out just in time as ray ray hopped out the eskalade. and mad crazy shots went the fuck off. i bounced back to da stash spot to hold da heata. but dang wuldnt you kno i left da xtra clipz at the spot son." dude i heard his on a documentary about gang violence i wish i could ocme up with words liek that and have it be cool |
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dreadkill said:
"U JANKYAZZ DONKEEDICK BUSTAH! IMMA JACK U IN DEM TEEFS WIF MAH EGGBERTS, YA HUUURD? JUZ PLAYIN, SON. HOLLACOPTA!"
HOLLACOPTA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
xmikex said:
ahaha that's fucking great.
I have 4 or 5 fucking great conversations going on right now. I'm too busy at work to organize them, though. I'll have to post them all when I get home. |
|
ahahaha, i can't wait to post this new shit. I hope to christ my account doesn't get deleted now, because I haven't saved any of these conversations locally yet. |
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menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: So which one you silly bastards is "Joe"?
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=171555399 |
hahaha I posted this before that last message by the way. I just read the new one though. |
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oh man this just keeps getting better. i might have to set one up too. |
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i could see P-Qwan on the Maury show
Maury-"P-Qwan saids he's not the father here is a video we shot before the show"
P-Qwan " Yo Maury I'm Here to tell everyone that Monque is a slut and i am not the father of her baby. i can't believe yo man shes a two dollar whore." |
|
haha |
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i have been ignoring this thread till now holy shit that was sick... i like the cyber sex one its hilarious she doesnt react earlier |
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tha P stops his flow for no lady, no bloodtest, no child support, no way, no how. yeAH! |
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what do you do this from, a fake profile? |
|
I think you should go fishin with " damn gurl dem raisin titties is wurt goin back to Rikers fo' |
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and maybe add this in your profile pics
my babies mama |
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Name:
*LAFFY TAFFY* TAKE A PICTURE, IT WILL LAST LONGER!
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...9fcbc8a-37d5-4e37-9656-6142ec20de42
Photo of Victim:
Photo I'm commenting on:
The comment I left:
sheeet son, Id buss up in dem guts, fo'reelreelz
The message she sent me:
WHATS GOOD WIT IT
My response:
nuttin much gurl, jus gettin mah stroke on to sum stuff in yoz myspaces picturs
Her:
O FA SHO... WHAT MADE U COMMENT MAH PIX OUT OF THE BLUE
Me:
nawreason. jus browsin an stumbld accros yo spaces. den i saw dat pictur of dat cutie an den just had 2 play sum pocketgolf
Her:
DAMN LOL LET ME REFRAZE THAT, THAT WAS MAH BABY SISTER PIX U COMMENTED...IF U THOUGHT THAT WAS MAH BABY LIKE FROM ME LOL NAW
(She seems more upset over the fact that I wasn't talking about her rather than the notion of a full grown adult who can't speak English fucking her baby sister)
Me:
ahh it b cool, yo. eedah way, dat bitch be slammin!
holland
Her:
lol but yeah were u live at
Me:
i'z ova in compton right now at da men's sheltah. where u at?
Her:
upland
Me:
werd son, werd. |
|
Name:
.::& SHE WANTS TO BE HAPPY.
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...=user.viewprofile&friendid=27298040
Photo:
My Message to her:
was gOiN on'z gurl, u wanna gEt wt a tru ta life thugazz gangsta? i bring u on a ride dat da clowncars aint neva gunna trick dis ostrich
holla-saurus rex
Her reply:
NA I DNT WANT A GANGSTA...JUST A GUY WHO KNOWS HOW TO TREAT A GURL..AND UR CALI RITE
Me:
gurl, i kno'z how to treat mah peoples right ya heard? an where u at? arizonna? gurl, mah dick be reachin all da way ova to yo state n sheett
Her:
WELL I HAVE A BOYFRIEND....AND IM NOT THE CHEATIN TYPE..HA HA SO U THOUGHT U WERE GONNA GET SOME
Me:
mos def, gurl. nobodies can resist da charm uf holladaddy
Her:
LOL REALLY WELL I CAN
Me:
gurl, u dont knowz wut u missin, trickazz bustah. eye'll fuckin taye up yo azz like a ferris wheel full of gay scubadivers .
Her:
LMAO....WOW OK IF U SAY SO..
Me:
so cmon gurl, talks dirty 2 me. u knowz we was made fo' each utha.
Her:
NA ITS KOO...I TOLD U I GOT A MAN....
Me:
ok, i'll start if yo shy, gurl.
ok, we'z in church and i see u singin dere in da front pew, lookin all hot n shyt. afta da mass is ova, i cum up an sit next 2 u. i gently touch yo leg as i commplimant yo buutiful singin voice, den u reach up my priest robe an grab mah vagaina
Her:
I DONE TOLD U I GOT A MAN
Me:
u no yo man can neva be as much man as me right he-ya. cmon gurl, u'z beutifull. he dont gotsta no if itz jus talkin'
Her:
BUT MY MAN IS THE MAN I BEEN LOOKING FOR...
AND I CANT
Me:
maybee we'z can all freakay 2getha then.. i dont mind a lil dickplay as long as u dere 2 keep me hard likez a 4th grade math test.
Her:
WOW THATS GROSS
Me:
NAW NAW, once u get passed da fractions, it gets easier n shit. remember dat the numerator goes ova da denoninator is all.
Her:
MY ANSWER IS NO
Me:
i tried dat once but da tests iz always multaple choice. 2 many optionz 2 choosse frum, always keepin da bruthas down |
|
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
I really am at complete fucking awe that people actually talk (eerr, type that is) like that. WTF?!
Not only is everything spelled phonetically, but what's with the caps lock? ARE THEY REALLY THAT FUCKING RETARDED THAT THEY NEED BIGGER LETTERS? naw mean?
I need to start my own bogus profile so that I can get in on this action. |
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Started this one out the same as the last...
Name:
:K@¥-K@¥: Ðñ† JðKê Mï Mð†hÄ £µKñ §h¥†
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...user.viewprofile&friendid=161509096
Age:
21
Photos:
My message to her:
was gOiN on'z gurl, u wanna gEt wt a tru ta life thugazz gangsta? i bring u on a ride dat da clowncars aint neva gunna trick dis ostrich
holla-saurus rex
Her reply:
boi u straight WhiLlN!
ahey boo do me a favor comment mi new picz n i will return da luv thanXx
K@Y-K@Y
holla-saurus rex---WaT Da HeLl DAt Iz?
Me:
ay yay gurl, why not be truggin da spotz off ya'llz ass? u wanna go wit 2 shopp da crizzle wit me? yo?
Her:
boi wat iz u talkn bout ..
Me:
gurl, dont be flackin da spizzle wit out even step-step-steppin off da supertraggles. naw mean? Dell PowerEdge 1850 dual xeon n shit. naw mean?
Her:
YeA BoI U HeARd BoUT DaT POWEREDGE 9080 DuAl xeon ..u needa go cop u up \'1 of dem...naw mean? dat shyt b on point
Me:
Let us make love, my darling swan princess.
Her:
boi u straight trippn ..do u b talkn lyk dat?
Me:
You'll have to excuse me madam. I do not fully comprehend what you are trying to say. Perhaps if you would enact a slight change in your language stylings, we could communicate with greater ease.
Her:
accordin 2 mi calculationz you the one who b talkn lyk dey been n college 4 da longest!
Me:
U DONT BE FUCKIN STEPPIN 2 ME LIKE DAT BITCH, IMMA CUT YO AZZ, FUUCKIN GUMPASS TRICK!
Her:
nicca u dnt fukn no u me ..u needa shut da fuk shyt up wid ya made up wordz n shyt nicca do me n u a fava n hit dat delete button shawday cuz u on sum dumb shyt folk .. n dnt fukn say u gonna cut me bytch nicca step 2 me correct u wanna say shyt lyk dat u dnt no me i dnt no u i culd take dat shyt 2 da fukn copz..u probally a fukn child melesta' bytch so fukn get ya shyt rite nicca
iight im out
pussy ass nicca
K@Y-K@Y
Me:
c'mon gurl. i see yo suckin yo thumb in sum uf dem picctaz, i gots sumtin u can sucks on.
Her:
nicca u fukn childish 4 real wen u b on ya 21 get @ me..iight until den get @ a slideline hoe cuz dat aint evn me shawday ..
Me:
gurl wutchu talkin bout? i's only 3 yearz yunga dan u. if u were 2 try me out id turn yo world upsidown.
Her:
man shawday wateva get on sumwere wid dat shyt ..i dnt mess wid lil kidz get off mi pge shawday 4 real
Me:
u nuttin but a trickazz bustah.
if u aint be messin wit little kidz, then why u showin piczz of u suckin on pacifiers n shit in u profile. u a fuckin fakeazz cunt bustah
Her:
get off mi pge dnt message me tell me wat da fuck i am u dnt no shyt bout me stupid ass nicca..
msg me again n ima block ya bytch ass n i aint 21 stupid fukn child melistor..get on sumwere wid ya ugly ass nicca damn..
K@Y_K@Y
Me:
realy? dam gurl, u gots da shortt end of da stick den, u lookz about 28
Her:
ahah nicca u funnie cuz u was da 1 tryna b a groupie bout im fine nicca so who caught up n diz 1 ...boi u so fukn stupid ..u da 1 calln me ya princess n shyt SO SHUT DAT FUK SHYT UP !
Me:
u nuttin but a trickazz bustah
Her:
iight datsa wat u think den thnk dat shawdaycuz im still do me ..ya dig but im dne tryna get u 2 get off mi jock so im out n i think itz funnie dat u tryna get mad @ sum1 u was tryna get wid so nicca get a lyf!
im out n u blockd
K@Y-K@Y
--------------
That's when she blocked me. I have no idea what she was saying towards the end. |
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the_reverend said: http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=97029204 |
I'd like to shake that guy's hand for acting like a human being. |
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menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: Name:
.::& SHE WANTS TO BE HAPPY.
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...=user.viewprofile&friendid=27298040
Photo:
My Message to her:
was gOiN on'z gurl, u wanna gEt wt a tru ta life thugazz gangsta? i bring u on a ride dat da clowncars aint neva gunna trick dis ostrich
holla-saurus rex
Her reply:
NA I DNT WANT A GANGSTA...JUST A GUY WHO KNOWS HOW TO TREAT A GURL..AND UR CALI RITE
Me:
gurl, i kno'z how to treat mah peoples right ya heard? an where u at? arizonna? gurl, mah dick be reachin all da way ova to yo state n sheett
Her:
WELL I HAVE A BOYFRIEND....AND IM NOT THE CHEATIN TYPE..HA HA SO U THOUGHT U WERE GONNA GET SOME
Me:
mos def, gurl. nobodies can resist da charm uf holladaddy
Her:
LOL REALLY WELL I CAN
Me:
gurl, u dont knowz wut u missin, trickazz bustah. eye'll fuckin taye up yo azz like a ferris wheel full of gay scubadivers .
Her:
LMAO....WOW OK IF U SAY SO..
Me:
so cmon gurl, talks dirty 2 me. u knowz we was made fo' each utha.
Her:
NA ITS KOO...I TOLD U I GOT A MAN....
Me:
ok, i'll start if yo shy, gurl.
ok, we'z in church and i see u singin dere in da front pew, lookin all hot n shyt. afta da mass is ova, i cum up an sit next 2 u. i gently touch yo leg as i commplimant yo buutiful singin voice, den u reach up my priest robe an grab mah vagaina
Her:
I DONE TOLD U I GOT A MAN
Me:
u no yo man can neva be as much man as me right he-ya. cmon gurl, u'z beutifull. he dont gotsta no if itz jus talkin'
Her:
BUT MY MAN IS THE MAN I BEEN LOOKING FOR...
AND I CANT
Me:
maybee we'z can all freakay 2getha then.. i dont mind a lil dickplay as long as u dere 2 keep me hard likez a 4th grade math test.
Her:
WOW THATS GROSS
Me:
NAW NAW, once u get passed da fractions, it gets easier n shit. remember dat the numerator goes ova da denoninator is all.
Her:
MY ANSWER IS NO
Me:
i tried dat once but da tests iz always multaple choice. 2 many optionz 2 choosse frum, always keepin da bruthas down |
i can't even begin to say just how funny that whole conversation is...oh my friggin' god... |
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menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:
Me:
gurl, dont be flackin da spizzle wit out even step-step-steppin off da supertraggles. naw mean? Dell PowerEdge 1850 dual xeon n shit. naw mean?
Me:
Let us make love, my darling swan princess.
|
holy shit...this is priceless!
...what the fuck does 'shawday' translate to?
|
|
Okay, I give. I fucking laughed out loud at this line
i bring u on a ride dat da clowncars aint neva gunna trick dis ostrich
holla-saurus rex
|
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DomesticTerror said: menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:
Me:
gurl, dont be flackin da spizzle wit out even step-step-steppin off da supertraggles. naw mean? Dell PowerEdge 1850 dual xeon n shit. naw mean?
Me:
Let us make love, my darling swan princess.
|
holy shit...this is priceless!
...what the fuck does 'shawday' translate to?
|
I'm fairly sure it's "shortie"...?
Please keep this going while I'm at work. I need gems like this to keep me going:
"eye'll fuckin taye up yo azz like a ferris wheel full of gay scubadivers"
|
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Granny_Monster said: DomesticTerror said:...what the fuck does 'shawday' translate to?
|
I'm fairly sure it's "shortie"...? |
ohhhhhh.... Now I see. I was wondering myself but had no idea.
...God I hate these people. |
|
do black people ever read bulletins or are they only good for posting spam? this ill azz bulletin got no replies;
From: P-Qwan
Date: Mar 26, 2007 9:05 PM
Subject scope dIs ill Poem I jus wrote
Body: yo, dis is base off a true story ya'll. I jus had ta git it out nah mean?
There once wuz a gurl named Fonesha
she wuz Fly so I sez "nice ta meet ya"
da girl gamme sum play
but she got pregnant one day
and I says "Bitch, squeeze dat baby back in fo' I beat ya!"
Fo REAL, all yall buSta ass uGly bitches think you gonna git da P ta pay child support Fuck YalL! YalL ain neva gonna caTch me yoU sloppY a$$ treedOlla BIATCH.
- P to tha Qwan ill senSative style yo
word |
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menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: Granny_Monster said:DomesticTerror said:...what the fuck does 'shawday' translate to?
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I'm fairly sure it's "shortie"...? |
ohhhhhh.... Now I see. I was wondering myself but had no idea.
...God I hate these people. |
Growing up in the projects taught me something, afterall! |
|
I'm trying to be more conversational (if that's what you can call it) with these people to try to lure them into better dialogue. So far it doesn't seem like it's working. I sent out a couple good ones this morning though, we'll see how it goes. |
|
Just whip up a really fucking stupid sentence or two, then go through your friends list and find 3 or 4 people that are currently online. Then send them the same message. Odds are that 2 of them won't respond back, 1 of them will be a flake, and the other one will be an idiot worthy or RTTP glory. |
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who the hell taught black people how to set their myspace for comment approval. now this beautiful comment will probably never see the light of day.
the girl:
the profile:
http://www.myspace.com/sexc_vastyle
the comment:
yo wut it do mah nubian princezz. im down ta buttah yo cornbread u slutazz trIck prossatute. u fly.
hoLla at ya boy!! |
|
*warning* this picture may make you a little dizzy
the picture:
the comment:
yo wut it is B. yalL looKin fyne az hellll girl. LemmE take a hacksaw ta dem tit-tayyyys. u flyazz guzzla trick. HolLLA!!
apparently she's into hacksaws because she left me this comment in return:
ty 4 the add an the comment on pic .. showing u some love holla |
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i finally got a rise out of a couple of them. i'll post the full conversations as soon as I can. |
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There's so much going on in this profile that it froze my browser. I offered here some constructive criticism and she took it the wrong way.
http://www.myspace.com/queenofthacliff
MY message to HER
wut Da fuk is up wit yo ProfiLe. dis niggaZ about ta have a sucka seezure from jus lookin at dis wack azz shit. who da hell designed dis hoochie mamma bullllshit? trickass bIatch.
hollAseizure
HER reply
WHO DA FUCK ARE U I DIDNT ASK U TO COME TO MY PAGE IF U READ CAREFULLY IT SAY HATERS LEAVE NOW SO U SHOULDHAVE PRESS THE X AT THE TOP AND DISSMISSED YO ASS OF MY SHIT BITCH
MY rebuttle
ey yo wuz dey a sale on capitul letterz at waLgreens uh somethin? bitcH u even tYpe liKe a busTah. wut u no bouT doRchestor B. yaLl ain't fah reel.
HER response again
FUCK U PAY ME!!!! AND OAKCLIFF IS WERE IM AT!!!! AND IM OUT THIS BITCH!!!!
MY last response
qUeen bUsta. das U. |
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have you guys used HOLLA-CAUST! in any of your messages yet? |
|
hahahahah
dreadkill said: have you guys used HOLLA-CAUST! in any of your messages yet? |
Yes. |
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Actually I just looked, apparently I've never used it in any of the conversations that made this thread, but I've used it a few times in conversations that didn't make the grade. At first I was working up to it with stuff like HOLLAtron, mr HOLLAnd's opus, HOLLAnd, HOLLA-saurus rex, HOLLA fo' a dallah, and so forth. |
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aaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahaha I totally forgot I wrote this...
I just went back and looked at the first message I ever sent on the HollaDaddy69 account. As soon I signed up, some white girl wrote me this message:
"THANX FOR DA ADD BOO
WUTS GOOD WITH U"
To which I responded:
"Fuck off and die, you race-betraying slampig." |
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menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:
What an attractive young lady. This whole thread is racist and should be banned.
|
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If ghetto retards are considered a race, then yes, I suppose I am horribly racist. |
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Aiiight so here's the story behind this one. I added this kid, and decided to put him on my top 8 for no real reason.
http://www.myspace.com/973sexy
My message to him
yo son wut da fuck yall. yalLz on my top 8 an I aintz even on yo top 24? dis iz bout respect nicca how u gunna play me like dat brah? i Ain't evn Tryin ta hear dat!
RESPEC nicca
holla
His reply
mah bad!! its like i dont consider mahself as knowin u cuz i dont know anything about u!!
My response
jus playin homie. lean back. you aight. ey u think yall could hang onTo a knife fo me?
His response
wat da hell? i dont get u!!
My Reply
dats it dawg. im sorry yo but you out. you off da top 8. we cool an all, but fo real,,, I cant hav no top 8 Bustah list goin on up in here. That shit iz wack. I repalced yall wit a girl too. Dis sum humileation shit right hurr. Hope dat burrns nicca. peace.
|
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hahahaa that's awesome.
And did I ever post the conversation I had about my knife thing? I randomly asked some guy to hold onto a knife for me, but he didn't say shit in response. I was wondering if that was just a coincidence that you asked somebody the same thing hahaha |
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i think i'm gonna make a book out of this and makes lots of $$. |
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menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: hahahaa that's awesome.
And did I ever post the conversation I had about my knife thing? I randomly asked some guy to hold onto a knife for me, but he didn't say shit in response. I was wondering if that was just a coincidence that you asked somebody the same thing hahaha |
hahaha yes you posted that one. that was my tribute ta HolLa Daddy |
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ohhhhhhh yeah... haha I searched for it in my browser but couldn't find it becuase I spelled knife the ghetto way as "kniffe". |
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That philly thug gangster girl I was talking to about dickholes in the eyes and stuff is like my best friend now for some reason. I'll have to post part2 of what transpired. |
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you should send a picture of yourself in black face |
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hahahahaha, black face.
Um a glAd dis shiZ riGht her iz sTilL poPin, fo rEalz yo. tIz fUnniEr tHen bLacK fAce! |
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xmikex said:
My response
jus playin homie. lean back. you aight. ey u think yall could hang onTo a knife fo me?
His response
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hahaha, I damn near shit myself laughing at that. Do g's really do that? hang on to knifes or guns for their bros?
|
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I'd expect any one of you RTTP OGs to hang onto a knife for me. |
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So a while back I said you can say anything to a black girl as long as you end it with "HOLLA". I found out that it just isn't true, and was a totally unfounded and ignorant thing to say.
But I also learned (or learnt) that you can literally, without exception, say ANYTHING to a black girl as long as you tell her she's fly. I just told some girl she was "Tha flyest azz skank bitch on da myspacez" and she sent me a friend request. DAYYYM. |
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This is the most important thread ever. I have to stop clicking on it at work. I'm going to give myself a hernia trying to stifle the laughter.
$holla-pop-pop$ |
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I'm assuming this kid is never writing back. So I'll post what I've got on the grounds that it's a great premise for fucking with one of these kids.
My message to Him
u take my bassketball u sucka azz muthafucka?
His relpy to Me
First of all I don't know you, second of all from do you know me from? and Third of all no I didn't take your fuckin ball
My Response
damn man I found it. it wuz unda tha couche da whole time. so dont get yo sucka azz panties in a knot. trickasz busta. you ain't neva gonna be as real as me.
wut.
somehow or another that ended the conversation. |
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hahaha that was fucking great. Lay that line on someone else and see where it goes. |
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menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: my html version is almost done. I'm just waiting on some bitch to readd me so I can grab the photo of her and her son.
http://dismal.ath.cx:8099/astronaut_bread/holladaddy69.html |
magnificent |
|
a few tips, you may or may not know:
fanger=finger
hurr=hair
thurr=there
whurr=where
comote=toilet
eenkpein=pen
oll=oil
|
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powerkok said: a few tips, you may or may not know:
fanger=finger
hurr=hair
thurr=there
whurr=where
comote=toilet
eenkpein=pen
oll=oil
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"Hurr" can also be used in place of the word "here" |
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Both Mike's fake myspace profiles have taught me so much about black culture. |
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Have you showed you the other secret one before? I forget.
The one I created for this thread is merely the newer public one. |
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largefreakatzero said: This is the most important thread ever. I have to stop clicking on it at work. I'm going to give myself a hernia trying to stifle the laughter.
$holla-pop-pop$ |
I don't even sit in front a computer at work and I laugh my fucking balls off all day thinking about it.
"yO nIcCa, cAn U hOlD oN 2 a kNife 4 mE?"" |
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After I had that conversation with the girl about fucking her as a 5th grader and thinking about the holocaust and killing her I was laughing all day long. People probably thought I was crazy.
They would have thought right. |
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I've got a couple of good ones brewing. I give you 100% permission to put any of my stuff on your website. |
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I'm ignorant and I'm creative enough however I might just have to use the whole "can u hold on to a knife for me" line- that's fucking priceless. |
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hahahahahaha
that's so funny that you got the maury video clip on there, I was seriously thinking about doing that before. That is really the epitome of urban culture. "I ain't want no baby I ain't yo babies daddy" |
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This is only the 22nd longest thread. |
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I just read this whole thread. I am madly in love with MSD. |
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My trickazz bustah charm never ceases to win over the ladies.
My crippling self-esteem issues do that just fine. |
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MSD is going to end up fucking an underage black myspace chick and then try to buy her off of her parents. I can see it now. |
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whats gonna happen if those people find the real "DaH NiGgUh U CaN TaKe HoMe 2 Ya PaReNtS"? |
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this busta is asking for some lovin from P-Qwan and "Dah NiGgUh". |
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Oh look... black people can riverdance! |
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damn
mike you're gettin some chops here, shit gets better and better
still I think MSD's edge and what makes him so brilliant is how well he lowers himself to the level of the people he's talking to, if you know what i mean
don't know how he does it
as I was scrollin down reading the latest I was thinking to myself this is the kind of thing that blows up on the internet if you made a page out of it
and then you did
s'awesome |
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i just noticed the chick from the longer cyber log is pretty much fuckin gorgeous
you guys think that's a real account? all the small, crap closeups of her tits and ass make me wonder
and none of her comments, photo or in the profile, are from people who seem to actually know her...that shit is definitely fake dude
it probably is actually a cop...or another fat white dude :P
i bet making a profile like that and trying to get these guys turned on is also funny as hell |
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i've got a bunch of good ones cooking right now. unless MSD posts some more this will probably be my last batch. |
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here's one. i didn't think this one would go anywhere, but it was still fun.
http://www.myspace.com/CandisRichburg
Message I sent to Her
yalLz tha bigGest busTah I ever seen. fo reelz.
HolLA Yall
Her Reply To Me
I'M NOT TRYNA B RUDE OR ANYTHING BUT, WHAT?
I DON'T UNDERSTAND THAT SHIT!
WHO DA FUCK IZ YALL, WHEN I'M ONLY 1 DAMN PERSON.
HOLLA BACK SO I CAN UNDERSTAND 'CAUSE I REALLY DON'T RITE NOW PARTNER.
~1~
My Reply To Her (not making sense)
ey yo da P ains nobadys partner yaLl. dis right hurrs a one man show baby all day straight poppin yall. i lay it out like yall don even know nicca straight up crackin B. yallz cant never touch my flow you bustah azz chickenhead.
Her Response
OK, WATEVA!
I STILL DON'T UNDERSTAND WAT THA FUCK U TALKIN' 'BOUT! N I HOPE THAT U NOT TRYNA CALL ME A CHICKEN HEAD NIGGA.
ANYHOW, WHEN U READY 2 TALK 2 A REAL MAMA U HOLLA @ ME 'CAUSE I DAMN SURE DON'T COMPREHEND THIS SHIT U SAYIN' HERE.
My reply to Her
pleez B. yaLl gunna step ta me when yallz is looKin like a giant azz Q-Tip. yO whoevas ears dat Qtip be cLeaniN out mus be dirrrty daWg cuz daT shIt tuRned black yall. ya hEard.
She Responds Again
YO LOOK, I DON'T KNO' WHO THA FUCK U R N WHO U TRYNA CLOWN ON BUT, I'M NOT THA 1 2 GET IT POPN' OFF WIT'!
UR NOT EVEN FUNNY N I DON'T KNO' Y U CLOWNIN' ON MY BANGIN' AZZ HAIRSTYLE.
U MUST NOT KNO' NIGGA, MY HEAD LOOK GOOD. IT'S MORE LIKE A MOP TOO N NOT A Q-TIP BOI! NOW
My Response To That
yo dis sexual tenshun is killin me. u got any noodz?
No response. Break a nicca's heart why dont ya.
|
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update:
she wrote back... "HUH? WAT IZ NOODZ?" |
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it's be pretty classic if the long convo with the young girl was some other person who has a website set up with their fake conversations on myspace too. |
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oh and if MSD and the guy who does the BloodNinja conversations were ever in the same room i think it would create some kind of antimatter vortex and suck the whole universe inside of itself. |
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Oh man.........These people are really low on the evolutionary scale. |
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dertoxia said: oh and if MSD and the guy who does the BloodNinja conversations were ever in the same room i think it would create some kind of antimatter vortex and suck the whole universe inside of itself. |
Bloodninja was definitely a huge influence in these conversations. |
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xmikex said: update:
she wrote back... "HUH? WAT IZ NOODZ?" |
BUUUUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!! |
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This thread really keeps me going. Please don't let the random harrassment end for any reason. |
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I can see a video game coming from this
Myspace: Race Wars - Ebonix |
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Troll said: Oh man.........These people are really low on the evolutionary scale. |
you wish.
in 200 years we will ALL not know how to use a condom. 'N Shit.
|
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I vote this one of the best threads of all time. |
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Murph nli said: I can see a video game coming from this
Myspace: Race Wars - Ebonix |
hahahaha |
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menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: Name:
PhillyThugGansta: 2NeVa LeAvE U My AnGeL4
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...14a38ae-9242-4125-b941-44eaddeb96da
Main Photo (NOTE: THIS IS A WOMEN):
Photo caption:
"G I AM FRESH 2 DEATH LOL"
Bulletin SHE posted:
"IF N E MEN HAD EVA DISRESPECT A LADY & IT COULD B UR MOM ESPECIALLY, ETC. ALL FEMALES P.T.G WILL KICK UR AZZ SO A MSG 2 ERR 1 LADIES: DUN BAK DOWN 4 NO BULLSHIT & MEN: KEEP UR MOM, AUNTY & GRAND MA SAFE U DIGG, "G UP" WHEN U HAVE 2"
My response:
"P1ckz up a fuckin book, yo gump ass bitch. u best not step to mah hood in compton. we fuckin string up ya cunt niggah azz.
fo'reelreelz"
Her response:
"YO DUMB FUK WDF R U TALKIN BOUT?"
Me:
u herd me... BIATCH
Her:
I STICK MY GAP N UR MOUTH PUSSY SO Y R U BRING DRAMA FUCKIN PUSSY
Me:
ALL FUCKIN TALK BIATCH.. I BETCHU WULDNT NEVA STEP 2 ME IN COMPTON.. TRICKAZZ BITCH
Her:
BET U'LL NEVA STEP N PHILLY I GO YOUNG GUNZ ON UR AZZ U SHITY AZZ
Me:
ILL RAPE YO HOLE FAMILY N LEAVE EVERBODY U CAREZ ABOUT DEAD WIT DICKHOLEZ IN THEY EYES |
PHILLYTHUGGANGSTA UPDATE
(I kept trying to re-add her with no responses from her until finally...)
Her:
TELL ME Y SHOULD I ADD U?
Me:
cuz u n me were madez fo each otha, gurl
Her:
YEA RIGHT AFTER WE CUSS EACH OTHA DA FUK OUT IDK
(A week or so passes. She also has a new default pic and messages me out of the blue.)
Her:
YO B r u mad at me?
Me:
nah gurl... wut's shakin?
Her:
MY HEART NAW JK NAW I'M JUS CHILLIN WAT ABOUT U KRUMPET?
(BORING... I never wrote her back. She now keeps messaging me, though. She left me picture comments on almost every picture.)
Profile comment she left me:
I'M SHOIN ;UV ON UR PG HOMEY SO BRING IT BAK 1
Message she sent me:
Subject: :>
Body: COMMENT MY PICZ AND ME BAK PLAYBOi |
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Lull her into a false sense of security, then tell her you wanna fuck her Dad. |
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THAT'S A GREAT IDEA.
I'll do it! |
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hah, wtf... the guy who's profile I copied just added this picture to his photos:
|
|
HOFFA!!!!!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
To new levels.
New fucking levels. |
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You are changing black people as a whole. |
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this thread made me late to work the other day. |
|
hahaha PhillyThugGansta just left me a comment saying:
"wat'z up wit ur music i was terrified a lil on sum real haha and i know wat???"
Also... I'd to add that the guy who's profile I copied just added this photo:
I went ahead and added this photo to my own:
My caption:
"dere aint nuttin i luvs mo' dan black metal and total recall" |
|
Seriously.
Like I said, my brother now says 'fo realrealz' after most sentences.
AND....I read this to my wife, who usually HATES my supposed bigotry, and she laughed her fucking tits off.
This is world class shit. |
|
hahahahaha Quato/Abbath mix?
sweet.
I noticed a lot of these guys lift their shirts up, as if displaying no/some bullet holes. |
|
haha I knew seeing movies at the Randolph Movie Theatre would pay off. |
|
Wow, could you even hear the movie? |
|
powerkok said: Wow, could you even hear the movie? |
haha nope but you always new one some "nigga" should "look tha fuck out yo!"
and then you knew something bad was gonna happen. |
|
Samantha said: I'm beginning to think that the movie Idiocracy truly is an accurate depiction of humanity's future. |
I'm still waiting for the first episode of OW! My Balls! to air...
that movie was hysterical. just watch out for Upgrayde the Pimp! |
|
i love how you have devourment on your page.
thats keepin it gangsta fo real |
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DreamingInExile said: Samantha said:I'm beginning to think that the movie Idiocracy truly is an accurate depiction of humanity's future. |
I'm still waiting for the first episode of OW! My Balls! to air...
that movie was hysterical. just watch out for Upgrayde the Pimp! |
That would be spelled, "Upgrayedd". The extra "d" is for a "double-dose of pimpin". |
|
I am honestly beside myself with how purposely retarded there assholes spell shit. It really is harder for me to try and type like that than it probably is for them to type with proper spelling and grammar. |
|
YOU HAVE GOT TO BE SHITTING ME...
Name:
BLACC/KOREAN IS DA NEW SEXY CUZ(RGz)
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...=user.viewprofile&friendid=39774514
Photo:
Message she sent me:
Subject: hey cutie checc it out
Body: i commented all yo pics so go comment mine fa me
My response:
sendz me pics uf ya dangazone first dawg
hollacaust
Her:
HUH ? boi wat is yo prob i jus asked fa u 2 comment my pics fa me an wat language r u speak n cuz dat dont look like english
Me:
You should talk about who can speak proper English, you stupid fucking ignorant cunt bitch. You didn't spell a single word right in your last message.
Have a great day.
Her:
awww that is messed up see i only talk like that to impress other black people i dont even spell like that and you dont have to call me out of my name like that did i call you a bitch ? no i didnt its all a matter of respect but ok i guess thats how you were raised lol but hey i was raised a little more different from you i atleast know how to treat someone respectful but i can see you dont
ONLY TALKS LIKE THAT TO IMPRESS OTHER BLACK PEOPLE???????????????
How the fuck do I even respond to that. This blows my mind. Humanity is fucking doomed. |
|
respect never ceases to be an issue with black people.
black people hate to disrespected. FACT. |
|
anonymous said: respect never ceases to be an issue with black people.
black people hate to disrespected. FACT. |
That's why they always call each other nigger. |
|
Holy Fucking Shit.
The Real Undercover Brutha.
hahahahaa that is amazing. wow. |
|
apparently this wigger kid can't handle the wrath of P-Qwan
http://www.myspace.com/chiefwiggem
My mesage to him
dis sum straIght uP busta foo azz shIt. sTep Da fuk ofF chIcKenhead guzzLa.
His reponse
hmmm, i didn't step ta you and yet i'm being told to step back...interesting.
My final word
cracka azz bustah. shuT yo fool heAd up. ainT yo azz laTe fo badmintOn practice uh somethin. check yo self foo.
|
|
Name:
*It's bout Me*
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...14896bb-7884-40cd-ac07-a9ba1cee8e3a
Photo:
Photo's caption:
"such a cutie!!!!!!"
Message she sent me:
when u left dat comment,what did it mean
My response:
smuggadug
Her:
and what does dat mean?
Me:
Rasnozzle gus gus gus!
Her:
lol! anywayz if u want 2 leave me anotha comment,cuz i deleted da one u left, u can leave me anotha comment
Me:
Why r u fuckin wit me?
Her:
what r u talkin about?
Me:
I'm wise to your games, trickster.
Her:
neva mind just 4get about it. ok |
|
xmikex said:
MESSAGE FROM THIS KID TO ME (in reference to my Maury Povich "Not the Father" video on my page):
rom: It's my time
Date: Mar 24, 2007 12:20 PM
yo, is that u in the video?
MY RESPONSE
From: P-Qwan
Date: Mar 24, 2007 5:58 PM
ey Yo man I wish. I wish fo once one a dem blood tests wuld come back neggative. I hads like eight ah dem alrudy day all say days mine. Dang man sumtimez I feel like drownin them little bitchass rugrats and they mamas. Wipin dey noses all ova my fly ass threads amd shit. u Feelin me dawg?
HIS REPLY
Body: lol...i hear you. |
This guy is the biggest fag. Since you posted this, he keeps messaging me. Here's the latest of my conversations with him...
Name:
A Nigg@ Like Me Stay On Top Of My G@me !
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...2f5895a-8a95-40a9-a6f0-d60c40da376e
Photo:
His message to me:
u like my new pic?
My response:
ya dawg, i jus fuckin busted 1 out.
gotz me so hard thurr
hoffa
Him:
thnax.
Me:
so wut r u wearin?
Him:
right now im in my under wear and u?
Me:
i b wearin only panties right now hurr
Him:
sounds good! what kind?
Me:
You're a cop.
Him:
no im not a cop. y would i be a cop. r u a cop?
Me:
Yes. Yes I am.
Him:
r u for real? dont play with me please.
Me:
You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be provided for you.
Him:
dont keep playin wit me. u cant be a cop, the stuff just doesnt add up.
Me:
Why u say dat? U sayin a cop cant be black? Dats racest.
Him:
thats not wat i mean...lol
Me:
I can fit my fist in my ass.
He immediately sent a myspace IM request to me. This guy is like a black CastleDoomerown
|
|
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:
HAHA this girl fucking SUCCCKKKSSS. I kept leaving her comments telling her to get her dumb ass in check and stop leaving spam bulletins. She deleted it and responded with
her comment to me
look don't be leavin no stupid ass commentz on my page. if u want me 2 change my password den messege me like yo ass has sum damn sense!
my comment in return
awww damnzzz, i'm sorry. mus be annoyin getting dumazz shit dat nobady wanz 2 read shuved in yo face.
now yaLl knOw hoW i feelz u virus carryin biAtch
she responded with
thanx but my name isn't biatch
I very maturely responded with
yo namez be wutevaz I say it iz. and u bes be thankn me fo teachIn yo dumB azz hows ta use a computa u busta azz knuckledragga.
|
|
xmikex said:
i thought i made that up as an ebonix term. apparently not. |
|
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: I went ahead and added this photo to my own:
My caption:
"dere aint nuttin i luvs mo' dan black metal and total recall" |
i almost shit my pants when i saw that. |
|
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: Name:
Me:
Rasnozzle gus gus gus!
|
i almost died from this. probably the funniest thing i've ever read in my life. |
|
gus gus gus, nigga!
seriously, though. Someone told me to say "HOLLAday Inn" in some of these. |
|
xmikex said: menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:
HAHA this girl fucking SUCCCKKKSSS. I kept leaving her comments telling her to get her dumb ass in check and stop leaving spam bulletins. She deleted it and responded with
her comment to me
look don't be leavin no stupid ass commentz on my page. if u want me 2 change my password den messege me like yo ass has sum damn sense!
my comment in return
awww damnzzz, i'm sorry. mus be annoyin getting dumazz shit dat nobady wanz 2 read shuved in yo face.
now yaLl knOw hoW i feelz u virus carryin biAtch
she responded with
thanx but my name isn't biatch
I very maturely responded with
yo namez be wutevaz I say it iz. and u bes be thankn me fo teachIn yo dumB azz hows ta use a computa u busta azz knuckledragga.
|
UPDATE
she commented back with
u know what fuck u, u ain't nobody
My comment to her
ey yo Id ratha be nobody den be a brokeazz goRilla looKin bizatch like yo selF. yalL loOkin likE pAtrick ewIng wit a weave. i dunno why yallz bustin on me. i aints steals yo bananas. BiATcH
she commented back
look u know what,just forget about everything i said and what u said. i'm gonna act like da adult since yo ass can't. i'm sorry,ok.
i graciously accepted
apologee excepted. don lit it happen agin yalL gorillaz in da mist shawwwdy.
HOLLA - luyah! |
|
hahahahaahahahahahahahaahah |
|
We should use the buddy system when we're in hell together. |
|
I RE-UPDATED MY LAST POST! |
|
OMFG! LMFAO!
|
|
xmikex said: I RE-UPDATED MY LAST POST! |
shawdaay! |
|
i aints steelz yo bannanas biatch!
hahaha i spit my "black" coffee all over the place |
|
Mess said:
You should be ashamed of yourself. |
|
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: Name:
♥MeL-oDy JoYcE-LyN
Photo:
|
I'd hit it.
|
|
I really really thought this one was gonna go further, but I guess I sketched her out too soon.
http://www.myspace.com/CuteAllTheWayThrough
This girl is bi-sexual or something (I somehow found a bunch of lesbian black girls who all added me). I left her a comment calling her the flyest ass dyke on myspacez. She deleted it and sent me this message....
Her to Me
Why u call me a dyke????
Me Back to Her
ey yo don even sweat it babiegurl. dats jus like a term of affecshun. nah mean? like 'yo dawg' or 'wuz crackin nicca' or 'imma bust up in dat dyke snatch'. das just how we git down up in da Bean, nah meen? don't u worry you fly sexy ass dyke head about it gurlie girl. aiiight?
holla
It got no response, but the next day she sent me this with the title "Just sayin HI!"
Whats Good P- Qwan???
I responded
yo yo. not much over hurr. wuz crackah-lackin wit u gurrl? yo wuz BuffaLo like? i might needs ta be layin low somewhre for a while. da cops iz lookin for me agin. let ya boy know yall flyazz chickenhead dyke girlie gurl.
hoLla wit ya bad self
She replied
It looks old, its small u can go from one side of the city to the other n like 45min... But the downtown clubs r off the hook we knw how to party thats what people cum here for....
P-Qwan responds
awwww yeah. u know how ya boy does his thang. goin downtown ta git down for real reelz. shit sounds fresh girl. u think u could maybe do me a solid an hide a brotha out there fo a few dayz? tha cops always be ovareacting wen dey says dey find yo DNA at da crime scene. nah meen? holLa bacK homegirl
- P
she has thus far resisted any attempts to contact her |
|
Name: I GOT THE FANS TAKIN' PICTURES OF ME
http://www.myspace.com/b_attice
I tried this line out on a bunch of people, he was one of the only dudes that took it...Me to Him
Yo yo, ain't yall boyz wit Leroy?
His message to me
NAW! WHO'S LEROY? WE AIN' RAPPERS
My reply
dOn't front. i Got no beeF wit u, bUt u see dat sucka azz busta shaDy shade shade azz nicca Leroy u teLl him I wan my mOney or I gunna stab em in his utha eye. aiight?
holla.
He replies
I DON'T KNOW WHO LEROY IS! WHAT MAKES U THINK I KNOW THIS DUDE?
My message to him
yo son yall aint hearin me. i gots no beeF wit u. aight? u jus tell mista 'aint no thang if i be gaffin tree dollaz from P-Qwan an neva payin him back' dat im gonna put his wacK azz in a whelchair! i don plaY dat shit son. we coOl tho.
no response |
|
haha those last 2 were fucking great. Your best work to date. |
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menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: haha those last 2 were fucking great. Your best work to date. |
i agree, pretty funny. |
|
have you heard of niggaspace.com?
its like myspace but filled with nigga's |
|
wow there actually is that site i just googled it. |
|
this thread is amazing, anyone down for some 'HOLLA PATROL' t-shirts? |
|
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: YOU HAVE GOT TO BE SHITTING ME...
Name:
BLACC/KOREAN IS DA NEW SEXY CUZ(RGz)
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...=user.viewprofile&friendid=39774514
Photo:
Message she sent me:
Subject: hey cutie checc it out
Body: i commented all yo pics so go comment mine fa me
My response:
sendz me pics uf ya dangazone first dawg
hollacaust
Her:
HUH ? boi wat is yo prob i jus asked fa u 2 comment my pics fa me an wat language r u speak n cuz dat dont look like english
Me:
You should talk about who can speak proper English, you stupid fucking ignorant cunt bitch. You didn't spell a single word right in your last message.
Have a great day.
Her:
awww that is messed up see i only talk like that to impress other black people i dont even spell like that and you dont have to call me out of my name like that did i call you a bitch ? no i didnt its all a matter of respect but ok i guess thats how you were raised lol but hey i was raised a little more different from you i atleast know how to treat someone respectful but i can see you dont
ONLY TALKS LIKE THAT TO IMPRESS OTHER BLACK PEOPLE???????????????
How the fuck do I even respond to that. This blows my mind. Humanity is fucking doomed. |
UPDATE: CONTINUED CONVERSATION
Me:
Why would you talk different to impress black people?
Please explain this logic.
Her:
because its a certain way us black people talk like gang bangers for example thay have there own talk an thats what im use to talking and spelling the way they do an this isnt how i talk all the time dis is da way dat i b spell n out ma words see thaths the writing and talking im use to doing
Me:
wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute... now you've confused me.
Gangbangers can't read or write.
Her:
WHO TOLD YOU THAT
Me:
It's a well-known fact.
Her:
the ones i grew up with can read write and think and they're gang bangers real ones at that
Me:
This has been a fascinating discussion. Send me nudes.
Her:
awww u pervert i dont do nudies
Me:
Really? How do you shower?
Her:
uhhhh naked ! but i only act an do nasty things with a boyfriend not random people so uhh yea you really wont get much out of me
Me:
gurl, u needz ta b mah gurlfrend, den so i can taye yo ass up n cut up ya face n shyt.
holla |
|
P-Qwan and MSD need to be on the N-Space |
|
Name:
Victoria
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...25d01d7-03a8-4d82-81f7-afbcf68535dd
Photo:
Her message to me:
hey whats up
My response:
Your cholesterol.
Her:
so what you doing
Me:
nuttin much gurl. jus gettin mah stroke on 2 sum of yo picturez
Her:
ooo
so whats your name??
Me:
Chuggs. What r u wearin gurl?
Her:
im not at home so i am wearin pants and a top
Me:
hawt!
Her:
you are mad sexy
Me:
thanx gurl. u wanna touch mah dick?
Her:
ya baby
Me:
touch it. it wont bite gurl.
Her:
lol i wish i could
Me:
i'll shove mah fist in yo cunt
(She didn't write back so I wrote her another message after a day or so)
Me:
C'mon jiggles, let's party!
Her:
(Yes, that was a blank response she sent me. I responded by doing the same...)
Me:
Her:
hey baby whats up
Me:
Your cholesterol.
(Doesn't she realize we've had this conversation before?)
Her:
so what you doing
Me:
Researching an effective alzheimers medication plan for you. What are you doing?
Her:
um im just sittin in ma room and playin on ma laptop
Me:
I fucking hate you so much. |
|
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: xmikex said:
MESSAGE FROM THIS KID TO ME (in reference to my Maury Povich "Not the Father" video on my page):
rom: It's my time
Date: Mar 24, 2007 12:20 PM
yo, is that u in the video?
MY RESPONSE
From: P-Qwan
Date: Mar 24, 2007 5:58 PM
ey Yo man I wish. I wish fo once one a dem blood tests wuld come back neggative. I hads like eight ah dem alrudy day all say days mine. Dang man sumtimez I feel like drownin them little bitchass rugrats and they mamas. Wipin dey noses all ova my fly ass threads amd shit. u Feelin me dawg?
HIS REPLY
Body: lol...i hear you. |
This guy is the biggest fag. Since you posted this, he keeps messaging me. Here's the latest of my conversations with him...
Name:
A Nigg@ Like Me Stay On Top Of My G@me !
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...2f5895a-8a95-40a9-a6f0-d60c40da376e
Photo:
His message to me:
u like my new pic?
My response:
ya dawg, i jus fuckin busted 1 out.
gotz me so hard thurr
hoffa
Him:
thnax.
Me:
so wut r u wearin?
Him:
right now im in my under wear and u?
Me:
i b wearin only panties right now hurr
Him:
sounds good! what kind?
Me:
You're a cop.
Him:
no im not a cop. y would i be a cop. r u a cop?
Me:
Yes. Yes I am.
Him:
r u for real? dont play with me please.
Me:
You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be provided for you.
Him:
dont keep playin wit me. u cant be a cop, the stuff just doesnt add up.
Me:
Why u say dat? U sayin a cop cant be black? Dats racest.
Him:
thats not wat i mean...lol
Me:
I can fit my fist in my ass.
He immediately sent a myspace IM request to me. This guy is like a black CastleDoomerown
|
UPDATE: CONTINUED CONVERSATION
Him:
hey sexy...so wat uve been up to?
Me:
I'M A COP!
Him:
if u dont wanna tlk to me thats all u got to say but dont keep lyin.
Me:
I'm dead serious.
Him:
okay then. wat r u doin on here then. r u catchin child predators?
Me:
yes.
Him:
so how r things comin along?
Me:
I want to touch your manhood.
Him:
dont play wit me. r u really a cop tho?
Me:
YES. JESUS. Now where can we meet? I want to suck you off so bad.
Him:
we cant meet b/c im on the east coast and ur on the west. plus ur a cop. you'll lock me up.
Me:
I can fly out dere.
Him:
would u really travel that far just to do that?
Me:
mos def, son. mos def
Him:
i think thats a little much dont u? y cant we just be myspace buddies?
Me:
cuz we cant fuck ova mysapce, yo
Him:
but we can tlk. dont u like to tlk.
Me:
I'M A COP! |
|
I just erased like 5 other conversations I had going because they were even stupider than these ones. I was trying to convince one girl to let me video tape her fucknig a horse. She wasn't going for it. I told her I'd find her a nice Mr. Ed type sexy horse. |
|
largefreakatzero said: xmikex said:this thread is flawless. somebody find me a picture of some Yo Yo so I can make my own profile. |
pfft..that shit doesn't even spin |
|
|
largefreakatzero said: xmikex said:this thread is flawless. somebody find me a picture of some Yo Yo so I can make my own profile. |
pfft..that shit doesn't even spin |
|
|
largefreakatzero said: xmikex said:this thread is flawless. somebody find me a picture of some Yo Yo so I can make my own profile. |
Done & done. I just did a google image search on "wigger." The results were amazing. This isn't the best one, I am limited at work to what I can click on. |
i mean that shit |
|
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: Name:
Victoria
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...25d01d7-03a8-4d82-81f7-afbcf68535dd
Photo:
Her message to me:
hey whats up
My response:
Your cholesterol.
Her:
so what you doing
Me:
nuttin much gurl. jus gettin mah stroke on 2 sum of yo picturez
Her:
ooo
so whats your name??
Me:
Chuggs. What r u wearin gurl?
Her:
im not at home so i am wearin pants and a top
Me:
hawt!
Her:
you are mad sexy
Me:
thanx gurl. u wanna touch mah dick?
Her:
ya baby
Me:
touch it. it wont bite gurl.
Her:
lol i wish i could
Me:
i'll shove mah fist in yo cunt
(She didn't write back so I wrote her another message after a day or so)
Me:
C'mon jiggles, let's party!
Her:
(Yes, that was a blank response she sent me. I responded by doing the same...)
Me:
Her:
hey baby whats up
Me:
Your cholesterol.
(Doesn't she realize we've had this conversation before?)
Her:
so what you doing
Me:
Researching an effective alzheimers medication plan for you. What are you doing?
Her:
um im just sittin in ma room and playin on ma laptop
Me:
I fucking hate you so much. |
She is from Burlington, VT? Ha ha! Why are so many of these people from Vermont? I grew up in the Burlington area, and there were a lot of wannabe gangster types there. They were the biggest joke of the city. Has the idiot population tripled since I moved away, or what? Oh, how I would love to drop some of those wannabe Vermont homies into the worst parts of South Boston, Roxbury, Dorchester, Jamaica Plain, Great Brook Valley or Main South in Worcester... etc., etc. |
|
i think i just spent an hour reading this shit and i shit my pants hardcore. some of you went far with some racist shit but the funny shit evened it out. to the kid that was talking to this chick
you shouldve kept talking to that bitch and asked for noodz, 10 bucks says she wouldve done it. im gonna try it. here |
|
I would have loved to, but she's 17. |
|
that girl went back and forth with comments for a while last night. She deleted all my comment eventually but not before I saved this yesterday afternoon.....
|
|
Totally different, but I still had fun with this one. This fool wrote me a message to correct something stupid in my profile.
Name: ~PPQ NIT@ ROO~ {?IM SOOO ? XRATED?}~
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...3a0e50e-545c-4072-b4be-193373ff81d2
Her Message to Me
IM JUST A RANDOM PERSON AND I SAW YOUR PAGE AND I JUST WANTED TO TELL YOU THAT NON-FICTION MEANS NOT FALSE SO THAT MEANS ITS ALL TRUE NOT A LIE.YOU CAN JUST LOOK PASS THIS ARE WHATEVER BUT I JUST WANTED TO TELL YOU THAT.
My response to her
"LIE.YOU CAN JUST LOOK PASS THIS ARE WHATEVER BUT I JUST WANTED TO TELL YOU THAT."
Hi, I just wanted to tell you that "are" (an auxiliary verb meaning 'to be' or 'to take place') doesn't make any sense in when you say "look pass this are whatever". What you wanted to say was "or (a conjunction meaning 'either' and 'otherwise') whatever. I just wanted to tell you that even that is horrific grammar. I also just wanted to tell you that the phrase "look pass this" doesn't make any sense in any existent human language. The word is "past" not "pass". One may look "past" something, as in beyond, or through it, not "pass" something. I also wanted to point out that typically in the English language we put spaces after our periods. I don't know what "LIE.YOU" is supposed to mean unless ".YOU" is some sort of file extension I've never heard of. I also wanted to point out that in any Latin based written language it's customary to use both uppercase, and lowercase characters in order to differentiate between the beginning and ends of sentences, proper nouns, etc. That's expected even IF you spill strawberry soda on your caps lock key. I just wanted to tell you that.
It's a joke you busta azz foo. Wulcum to da Englizh language yAll. HOLLA!
surprise surprse no response.
|
|
i love how you guys go from talking jive to talking proper english too talking jive again its great. |
|
i can't believe this thread has been going on almost for a month already. |
|
its the best thing i have ever read.
stupid crackas. |
|
quick question, am i the only NON-WHITE person reading this thread? |
|
anonymoustache said: quick question, am i the only NON-WHITE person reading this thread? |
there are, as you put it, "non-white" people who read, and post on this board. so probably not. |
|
someone should photoshop this guy to wear a misfits shirt or something like that. |
|
xmikex said: Totally different, but I still had fun with this one. This fool wrote me a message to correct something stupid in my profile.
Name: ~PPQ NIT@ ROO~ {?IM SOOO ? XRATED?}~
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...3a0e50e-545c-4072-b4be-193373ff81d2
Her Message to Me
IM JUST A RANDOM PERSON AND I SAW YOUR PAGE AND I JUST WANTED TO TELL YOU THAT NON-FICTION MEANS NOT FALSE SO THAT MEANS ITS ALL TRUE NOT A LIE.YOU CAN JUST LOOK PASS THIS ARE WHATEVER BUT I JUST WANTED TO TELL YOU THAT.
My response to her
"LIE.YOU CAN JUST LOOK PASS THIS ARE WHATEVER BUT I JUST WANTED TO TELL YOU THAT."
Hi, I just wanted to tell you that "are" (an auxiliary verb meaning 'to be' or 'to take place') doesn't make any sense in when you say "look pass this are whatever". What you wanted to say was "or (a conjunction meaning 'either' and 'otherwise') whatever. I just wanted to tell you that even that is horrific grammar. I also just wanted to tell you that the phrase "look pass this" doesn't make any sense in any existent human language. The word is "past" not "pass". One may look "past" something, as in beyond, or through it, not "pass" something. I also wanted to point out that typically in the English language we put spaces after our periods. I don't know what "LIE.YOU" is supposed to mean unless ".YOU" is some sort of file extension I've never heard of. I also wanted to point out that in any Latin based written language it's customary to use both uppercase, and lowercase characters in order to differentiate between the beginning and ends of sentences, proper nouns, etc. That's expected even IF you spill strawberry soda on your caps lock key. I just wanted to tell you that.
It's a joke you busta azz foo. Wulcum to da Englizh language yAll. HOLLA!
surprise surprse no response.
|
hahahhaa bravo. Please post if she gets up off the floor and types a response. |
|
i just noticed that msd had internet message sex with a 17 year old lol. |
|
I didn't read most of the posts but definitely one of the best threads ever on the interweb. |
|
dreadkill said:
I'll post some more tomorrow. I have 17 conversations stored up. Most probably lame. |
|
hahaha
i kinda thought so but wasn't sure. that's great. you're going to do a lot of damage with that profile i can see it now. she's a "strong black women" |
|
Oh yeah. I have to post them. Maybe I'll work on that now. |
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menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: Oh yeah. I have to post them. Maybe I'll work on that now. |
yeah, fuck real work. this is better. |
|
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: Name:
Victoria
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...25d01d7-03a8-4d82-81f7-afbcf68535dd
Photo:
Her message to me:
hey whats up
My response:
Your cholesterol.
Her:
so what you doing
Me:
nuttin much gurl. jus gettin mah stroke on 2 sum of yo picturez
Her:
ooo
so whats your name??
Me:
Chuggs. What r u wearin gurl?
Her:
im not at home so i am wearin pants and a top
Me:
hawt!
Her:
you are mad sexy
Me:
thanx gurl. u wanna touch mah dick?
Her:
ya baby
Me:
touch it. it wont bite gurl.
Her:
lol i wish i could
Me:
i'll shove mah fist in yo cunt
(She didn't write back so I wrote her another message after a day or so)
Me:
C'mon jiggles, let's party!
Her:
(Yes, that was a blank response she sent me. I responded by doing the same...)
Me:
Her:
hey baby whats up
Me:
Your cholesterol.
(Doesn't she realize we've had this conversation before?)
Her:
so what you doing
Me:
Researching an effective alzheimers medication plan for you. What are you doing?
Her:
um im just sittin in ma room and playin on ma laptop
Me:
I fucking hate you so much. |
UPDATE: CONTINUED CONVERSATION
(If there's anybody I've been talking to that I thought had serious mental problems, it's this bitch.)
Her:
hey baby whats up
Me:
Your cholesterol.
Her:
so what you doing babie
Me:
Researching an effective alzheimers medication plan for you. What are you doing?
Her:
you are so hot i want to just fuck you babie |
|
Name:
Ya Gurl!!
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...576b725-e0c5-41a7-95ed-27d491ac4758
Photo:
Her message to me:
so wuz with ya cuttie
My response:
mashed potato sunburn colostomy
Her:
so do u think that we can get to know each other
Me:
mos def scuba shoe roast beef cholera lessons
Her:
what are u talking about roast beef what the fuck
Me:
gurl, i wantz ta crawl inside yo roast beef curtains n sheet
holla
Her:
why you did not answer my question
Me:
cuz tha dog soda rowboat dunkers dont holla at tha roofbacon
Her:
so u saying that im not cute
Me:
think whateva u want, u gumpass bitch.
Her:
dang what have i done to u
Me:
sallright wit chu eitha wit shadonkdonk skiing frisbees dig?
Her:
why you have to be so mean
Me:
thas jus howz i roll, gurl.
pazazzle-zazzle! |
|
xmikex said: I really really thought this one was gonna go further, but I guess I sketched her out too soon.
http://www.myspace.com/CuteAllTheWayThrough
This girl is bi-sexual or something (I somehow found a bunch of lesbian black girls who all added me). I left her a comment calling her the flyest ass dyke on myspacez. She deleted it and sent me this message....
Her to Me
Why u call me a dyke????
Me Back to Her
ey yo don even sweat it babiegurl. dats jus like a term of affecshun. nah mean? like 'yo dawg' or 'wuz crackin nicca' or 'imma bust up in dat dyke snatch'. das just how we git down up in da Bean, nah meen? don't u worry you fly sexy ass dyke head about it gurlie girl. aiiight?
holla
It got no response, but the next day she sent me this with the title "Just sayin HI!"
Whats Good P- Qwan???
I responded
yo yo. not much over hurr. wuz crackah-lackin wit u gurrl? yo wuz BuffaLo like? i might needs ta be layin low somewhre for a while. da cops iz lookin for me agin. let ya boy know yall flyazz chickenhead dyke girlie gurl.
hoLla wit ya bad self
She replied
It looks old, its small u can go from one side of the city to the other n like 45min... But the downtown clubs r off the hook we knw how to party thats what people cum here for....
P-Qwan responds
awwww yeah. u know how ya boy does his thang. goin downtown ta git down for real reelz. shit sounds fresh girl. u think u could maybe do me a solid an hide a brotha out there fo a few dayz? tha cops always be ovareacting wen dey says dey find yo DNA at da crime scene. nah meen? holLa bacK homegirl
- P
she has thus far resisted any attempts to contact her |
UPDATED: Out of no where she messages me again
Her message to me
WHAT GOOD P-BABY!!!
I try to ease into this one
yo holla holla girl. how u livin?
Her response
Livin lovely! Peaches n cream always~! How bout u?
Getting bored... my response
glad ta hear it gUrl. im aiigt. like i said b4 i had sum trouble wiT da po po fo a while. but its alL good baBy girl. yall know how it is wit dem coPs. dey see a brotha walKin doWn tha street wit his shirT off all covad in blood an dey gots ta assume da worst nah meen? fo serious tho yaLl waNna shoW me a good tyme soMday wen I cum ta BufFalo?
hoLla flYgirl.
no response
|
|
"cuz tha dog soda rowboat dunkers dont holla at tha roofbacon"
BAH ha ha ha! |
|
Ok. I have a couple more converations going on that aren't finished yet with the holladaddy account, so now I'll introduce...
my new account and post some of those converations.
Here's the profile:
http://www.myspace.com/GhettoFreshness
|
|
My assumed identity:
"GhettoFreshness"
http://www.myspace.com/GhettoFreshness
Name of person I'm talking to:
P-Qwan
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...user.viewprofile&friendid=170398664
Photo:
My message to him:
WUT GOIN ON BOO?
His response:
ey yo wut g00d wit u my nubiAn princezz. i'm jus chiLlin ova hurr.
Me:
DATS FRESH B. WEAR U AT? WUT U INTO?
Him:
yo babiegUrl. u kNow I be straIght chiLlin up here in tha Dot, Dorchesta BeantowN shawwdy. shitz tha ilLest. wuT u wan me tA be into gurl? i think tha P wuld be down fo anytHin fo yo fly self. sum nipple bitin, sum uh dat s&m tie u up an shit sHit. dRop it on me B im down fo wuteva.
Me:
FRESH. I HAVEZ SUM FRENDS OVA IN DAT AREA FO'REAL. U EVA HEAR OF DA HIPHOP GROUP BETRAYED BY ALL? SUM MAH PEEPS IN DAT BAND. THEYZ OFF DA HIZZLE
FO'SHIZ
Him:
goddamnit. I wasted "tie you up n shit shit" for nothing.
(haha, I just had to start with you ) |
|
i want to marry this thread |
|
Remember the conversation me and Mike were hitting up with that guy guy before and I started saying "I'M A COP" all the time? He's one of the first people I added on the new profile...
My assumed identity:
"Ghetto Freshness"
http://www.myspace.com/GhettoFreshness
Victim name:
So Tired!
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...6e78193-4b69-4942-8265-a642d0accfe2
Photo:
His message to me:
thanx 4 tha add sexy. i see ur a capricorn, well i am too. i think we will get along just fine.
My response:
I'm a cop.
Him:
y is it that every1 i tlk to is a cop?
Me:
Well, you don't seem that bad to me so I'll level with you...
Whatever you did, you must have pissed off my boss's boss downtown because he's got the attention of the whole division pointed towards you. What the hell did you do to piss off Commissioner Frederickson?
-Det. Doyle.
Him:
i really dont kno. i talked to one other cop now im in this mess. i didnt say anything wrong. |
|
Mike, you have to message that guy as P-Qwan and tell him that you're a cop. |
|
I just had to copy the whole "Leeroy thing xmikex was doing. That shit was brilliant.
My assumed identity:
"Ghetto Freshness"
http://www.myspace.com/GhettoFreshness
Victim name:
SPRING BREAK BOUT TO BE THE BIZZ (1 MO DAY MESHA)
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...0b6a1c6-37f5-4d85-be53-0e3e2339309b
Photo:
Her message to me:
who is this
My response:
Lakendra gurl, u talk to leeroy lately?
Her:
u got the wrong person i dont know a leeroy
Me:
gurl, u stragith up trippin. LEEROY... ya know? small boo?
Her:
no u trippin i live in pomona i dont know him u got the wrong person
Me:
So how's Leeroy doin. Tell him Im still doin fine an shyt
Her:
how can i tell somebody that if i dont know him
Me:
iS LEEROY TREATIN U GOOD? TELL HIM BOUT DA ICECREAM CHAIR... HE'LL KNOW WUT I MEAN LOLz
Her:
ARE U NOT COMPRHENDIN I DONT GO WIT NO FUCKIN LEEROY
Me:
LET ME NO WEN U 2 ARE GOIN OUT 2 DA CLUB SOME TIME. I'LL HAV 2 TAG ALONG
HOLLA
Her:
whatever i dont know u or no mothafuckin leeroy so bick back
Me:
so wut u been up 2 lately?
Her:
bye
Me:
why wont u tellz me how u doin?
Her:
i dont know u i told u u got the wrong person
Me:
I jus wanna meet some new friends n shyt. What u like 2 do for fuN? Im into music, movies, readin magazines myself.
Lakendra
Her:
then y u didnt say that from the jump start
Me:
sorry gurl. so wut u up 2?
Her:
nothin at the house posted
Me:
werd gurl. U tawk 2 Leeroy at all lately?
Her:
WHO DA FUCK IS LEEROY I TOLD U I AINT WHO U THINK I AM DAMN WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WIT U GIRL |
|
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHHAHA
INTERNET FUCKING GOLD. |
|
My assumed identity:
"Ghetto Freshness"
http://www.myspace.com/GhettoFreshness
Victim name:
ITS ME BITCHES
Profile:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea...a2bd91e-e09c-417b-a687-1a9df28ad3e4
Photo:
His message to me:
thx 4 da add
My response:
SALL GOOD WHITEBOI
Him:
so wat u doin 2day
Me:
I GOTTA RUN DOWN 2 DA VD CLINIC LATA AN GET SUM SHYT CHECKED OUT NAWMEEN?
Him:
yea so wats ur name
Me:
Lakendra. How bout u?
Him:
jamaal
Me:
hahahahahahahaah no shit?
Him:
wat u doin 2nite
Me:
touchin mah dangerzone, thinkin bout chu.
howbout u?
Him:
thinkin about u
(I got bored with this one and never responded back.) |
|
SHOE LEMON!
I was wondering when someone was going to notice you copied their entire profile! |
|
The holladaddy guy noticed to. I'm in the middle of that conversation though. I'll have to post it when there's some more dialog going there. |
|
this is the best shit on the netz. hahaha.
the "sall good white boi" was fucking priceless. |
|
I kept doing that to people. One guy got so fucking pissed that I kept calling him whiteboi. |
|
I'll be constructing a new html page later. |
|
I'm going to change my entire holladaddy profile soon as someone else and start talking to some of these same people again. First up is that cybersex girl. Then KayKay. |
|
i love how if you throw somthing bad in with enough jive they don't even notice you said it |
|
haha exactly. That's what I've been doing all along. |
|
oh so i see theres a new girl in the mixxxxxxxx |
|
oh my god.. what a fucking retard. I'm handling this one. |
|
Why does every "gangsta" own one of these jackets?
It looks like the type of thing a parent would buy for a toddler, only bigger. |
|
www.myspace.com/puna20
this is a potential gold mine |
|
bahaha said: http://www.myspace.com/dgafn9ne
someone should take this kid down a peg or two |
what a fag i bet he'd never even seen a gun with a live clip in it |
|
bahaha said: http://www.myspace.com/dgafn9ne
someone should take this kid down a peg or two |
someone please fuck with this kid and post it i hate these fucking kids he's never fucking killed anyone |
|
haahaha, I just now realized that xmikex left me this comment:
"Thug Life Mr. C
THUG-LIFE" |
|
Why don't you honkies go join the Klan aready, cracker?
I ain't never seen so much RACISM in my life as in this thread.
I have got a white woman and she sees that there's a PERSON inside this dark skin, not just a NIGGER. |
|
I checked the PQwan account for the first time in like 2 weeks and somehow got myself involved in a rap battle. I'll post it when it's ready.
Oh, and that other kid is convinced I'm a cop. |
|
haha. I gotta log onto mine soon too. I had some hilarious shit going but then just got bored and stopped checking it. |
|
Tonight at 10:
Well-off white kids mock the ghetto life, with total insensitivity.
Lone black man seeks to even the score with a .44! |
|
Blacks dont own .44's, they own 25's. |
|
they own 45's
|
|
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: Mike, you have to message that guy as P-Qwan and tell him that you're a cop. |
Here we go....
ME
yo dawg, rememba me? wuts poppin?
Him
y did u ask if i remembered u or not?
Me
i wuz just seein wut yaLl wuz up to yo. u seemed liK a down azz nicca. holla at me. tell me wuz up yall.
Him
i had to hav sent u that message ova a month ago, maybe even 2 and now out of nowhere u decide im cool people. i bet you cant even tell me wat i said. can u?
Me
man wuts yo deal son? yall axed me about da video in my profile n shit. damn yo im new ta dis myspacez shiit an u da firss nicca ta messge me dat ain sum skankazz guzzla. yall wanNa rap wit me or u gunna keep trippIn?
Him
i dont think i do. but if u are not what i think u r then im sorry but i cant talk to u.
Me
i knew u wuz a cop or somethin. busta azz narc.
Him
oh dont get it twisted im not the cop u r.
Me
u bitchazz biscuithead. i ainz no cop. if i wuz a cop it be illegul fo me 2 say iz not a cop. an i AINZ NO COP. u jus a punkazz NARC bustah.
Him
okay wateva. but i kno the truth.
Me
yo say wuz up to ya boyz Fredrickson an Doyle. u fuggin 5-0 bitchazz snitch. imma tell everybady bout dat cr00oked azz shit yaLl be doin. teLl ya homie Doyle I no he be poppin hookers downtown. u juNior bacoN buRger snitchazz.
Him
i really dont wat ur talkin about.
Me
wut U gunna do sucka. u gonna arrest me or sick that Green Mile lookin bitch on me? who dat, yo new partner? u think u hard now cuz you got one of da aMerican glAdiatorz on yo back now? i don play dat shit.
Him
im not cop!
Me
U not cop? yo dey couldnt even teacH yo azz to talk right at tha police academy huh officer? dis iz sum straight up enTrapment shitt. wuteva yalL think u got on me aiNt never gonna stand up in no court. Imma tell my lawyer bout dis.
an stoP touchin yo selF when u looKin at dudez
Him
#1 u kno wat i meant, #2 im not a cop, #3 im not tryin to take u to court #4 wat do u mean stop touchin myself when i look at dudes and #4 if ur not a cop why is a cop on ur tops?
Me
fuck yallz, I failEd math clazz. i don need no numbers. u da biGgest cop I ever sEen. I no u be messagin dudes an taLkin bouT ruBbin dickz. busta.
and im thug life fool. my top 8 aint gots ta make no damn sense.
Him
wateva. get it together. ur a cop, i caught u, now just fess up like a man and move on with ur life.
Me
i aint no cop. i'm a real azz black man white bitch smackin cop killa. yous just a fuggin slave foo. a sucka azz tool to tha white power base. yaLl prolly aintz even black. yall don eveN no wut collard greenz is. yall culdnt even have a louD conversation iN a moviE theAter if u wanted to. yaLl proBably put yo garBage in a garbage can, an driNk apPle juice instead of KoolAid. Gaddamn b, i thinK im gunnA be siCk.
fakeazz guzzla.
Him
wat can i do to prove im not a cop?
Me
hang onto a gun fo me. itz gut some prints on it I don't need no cops ta see. feel me?
Him
um how about somethin not so scary?
Me
nigga please. maybe I shuld ask yo girlfriend if she wanna be down. she look like could handle her shit. not like u puzzy azz junior bacon bustah. u down or wut?
Him
no im not down. im not doin anything illegal or anthing against my morals for any1.
Me
You are the single dumbest kid on myspace. Anyone ever told you you've got a real bright future in astro physics? You're a regular Neils Bohr. You're under arrest for being a dummy. Handcuff yourself to the fridge and wait until someone comes to slap a dunce cap on your head.
You're fired. Leave me alone kid. |
|
DID SOMEBODY SAY PHLAWLESS! WOOT!
|
|
aahahahahahaha that was fucking great. That kid is borderline retarded. |
|
I just realized something. A lot of the conversations with these bitches are dead ends becuase they want to stop talking online and they want me to call them.
Is there even such a thing as long distance charges on cell phones anymore? I just should call some of these bitches and record it. |
|
I'm logging into these accounts for the first time about a month. I forgot how hilarious some of these conversations I had going were. I'll have to post them.
Also... if I didn't mention before.. somebody was talking to me on the girl's profile. Apparently she's flashing some specific gang sign in a lot of the pictures that I didn't notice before. I was asking questions and some guy was telling me all about the gang because he had friends in it and wanted to know who I knew in the gang. I'll have to find the conversation and post it. It wasn't all that hilarious, just interesting. |
|
jonnyc said:
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: This is only the 22nd longest thread. |
I guess now it's the 6th in terms of replies. |
|
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: I just realized something. A lot of the conversations with these bitches are dead ends becuase they want to stop talking online and they want me to call them.
Is there even such a thing as long distance charges on cell phones anymore? I just should call some of these bitches and record it. |
if you have nights and weekends you should be all set. |
|
I just read this whole thread. MSD, if you drink, I will buy you a beer at the next show you atz yo. This thread should be a sticky. |
|
haha. You can buy me a chocolate milk! |
|
this has got to be the longest running first page thread in pitt history. |
|
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: haha. You can buy me a chocolate milk! |
If the Bullpen has it! |
|
this thread is still halrious. |
|
I tried logging back in and getting this going again a few weeks ago but it didn't hold my interest anymore :( |
|
My DSL starting smoking when I tried to load to thread |
|
Remember KayKay?
I logged onto a different fake profile randomly to find something and I caught a bulletin she sent out to her friends list. This is what she wrote:
Subject:
BrOOk3 *N* SH!K@ R!P
Body
DO ANYBODI NO WEN DA FUNERAL IS?
I MiSS u MaMIz AlReDi
RIP Mi LiL HoNeYZ
UR AlreDi MiSsd So MuCh!
K@Y_K@Y
I followed it up with this response:
Are you talking about the funeral for your hilariously dead gang-banger impersonator friends or the funeral for your ability to write in grammatically correct sentences? I think the latter took place ten years ago when you started spreading your legs for crackheads who dress like rodeo clowns.
Holla.
She just blocked me. Very disappointing :( |
|
BWHAHAHAHAH...never stop this thread...way too fuckin funny! |
|
I think I have some serious-ass profile creating to do. Let me see what I can come up with... |
|
This beast posted a bulletin:
Her bulletin read:
R.I.P. Tony Thompson of HI-Five!! U will be missed!
P-Qwan's response was...err wuz:
i heard dat dude wuz iNto nuTtin on little kidz.
She wrote back
Whoa..oh yeah? I neva heard that...Ewwwww
P-Qwan
oh no wait... dats me. LoL!!
Her
Okay so u nasty...
P
u no u luv it BiG momMa. hell yea. i guts ta go tho, my 4 yea old nepHew be coMmin ova aNd it tIme 2 plY undeRgrOund raIlrode wit hIs aZzhole.
hoLla!
-No Response-
|
|
This one never quite ended in the big bang that I wanted to. Eventually I just got bored with it, but it gave me a chuckle while it was going on.
Name: BIG PIMPIN WIT KYLE
*NOTE* Keep in mind in his original profile pic it was him hugging some white girl
Him
Bro you say you got rhymes for dayz
i'll get you in a rap battle im nice
P
yo fool u say u nice
but ill put yo shit on ice
i raped yo momz in her azz
an da bitch gaves me pubic lice
battle all day baby, holla back.
Him
Dawg are you serious those were kiddy lines
Your bars sound like little nursery rhymes
Those 4 lines you sent me, who wrote you that shit?
Get back at me when you learn how to spit
Like a slave, i put you on the cotton field to get whippped
Then pull my pants down make you suck my dick
Ha my nigga watchu know about dat
Songs is always hot when i spit on the track
Im nice bro
P
haha aight dawg
yo who dat white bitch U huggin on?
git a white bitch dat close to me I get my thuggin on
slam ya girl in her azz like shez a true trick
skullfuck her face an break her nose wit my dick
yall wanna talk about a slave?
i'll put my fist in her azz and tell that bitch ta 'BEHAVE'
das how u know when U messin wit P-Qwan
cuz I ain no jungle fever sucka named "KyLe" gettin dissed on
holla
Him
Hahah not bad for a beginner
check it
You skullfuckin? I call it head
the only kids you fuckin are the ones in special ed
If a whit bitch get close to you, you gon get your thuggin on?
Let this wanna be J Kwan nigga get close to me he ya gon get nutted on
I already told you, your raps sound like a beginners
Me and that nigga Papoose are winners
My rhymes just ate yours and shit em out like doo doo
You know im right thats why you cryin boo hoo
I wasnt lying when I told you i was nice
call yo ass "the freezer" cause now yo shits on ice
(oh no but i aint done)
pull out the dice
Workin yo stuff like Krabs
da only niggas you kickin it wit are the schoolyard fags
Get back at me son, im nicer then Jay-Z, wack ass weezy,
holla back
P
jeyeah son
u better recognize nigga, tha name is P not J
put down tha watermellon when u type an it ain't hard to say
youz jus a punkazz, hidin out in the south
watchin yo girlfriendz kids, while she got my dick in her mouth
youd never step, to me up in the Dot
thats Dorchester son, not some corny backwoods spot
up here you catch tha skullfuck, and id watch u cry
when yo whole family be dead wit dickholes in dey eyes
whys every word out yo mouth got ta be about fags?
how much dick u and dem big nigga lips had?
yo stylez as dead as Martin Luther King
you probably tha kind of busta that still says "BLING BLING!"
So fo now Imma be here chillin up here in BeanTown
If yo chickenhead azz wants ta catch a lyrical beatdown
P - recognize and respect
hollaholla
Him
Ayo check this
I eat rhymes like yours for breakfast
Nigga this aint the South, its the Southwest
Why Am i rhymin to a scrub, I only battle wit the best
Mess wit me, ya get two up in ya vest
Do what i told you not to get two more up in ya chest
Is it Percey Perce, P- Quan or Percey P
You dunno watchu into, cause your fuckin wit a "G"
Anyone ever told you to stop rhymin, cause you suck?
Although i cant lie, battlin you was my warm up
Next time you wanna battle bring real competition
This little thing was just an exhibition
I pick apart my opposition
Im a true musician
Battlin me you put cha self in a bad position
Im feedin yo ass lyrical ammunition
Im killin you, should should call me a mortician
Think of something good during intermission
K Dot RECOGNIZE AND RESPECT
HOLLABACK
P
aww yea. da P iz back. i goT lockEd up fo a feW. but caNt no jail hold me son. and dey ain neva gonNa find dat kniFe i guts unDa my baby dAughters crib. LOl!
now were wuz we
yo, don't sweat my name or how u gonna spell it
just stop onto my block an u can hear yo girl yell it
"P-Qwan!" she be screamin, "P-Qwan u da illest!"
"My pussy be huge but yall knoW how ta fill it!"
watch me turn her inside out, homie u gonna be sick
with her face all bloody, and barbed wire on my dick
cuz dats how I roll, cuz I ain't to busta named Kyle
when I'm done she aint gonna be eatin solids for a while
but youz a watermellon sucka, u never step on my block
u try ta snatch my kOol aid yo shit wuld get rocked
got a problem wit da way I do u gonna get cracked
just git to tha back of da bus like Rosa Parkz dead azz
cuz im mean cuz im black cuz im black cuz im mean
and im tha realest azz nicca that u eva seen
all day
Him
You gotta baby girl? I didnt know two men could have babies unless you really a bitch!!!!
Ima hit em wit another one
check it
Every time you spit your lyrics get worse
I Thought I could hear better from a sucker named
"PERCE"
Stop on your block? Nigga I run it!
I wont be surprised if I roll up an see yo ass suckin dick
You stop by me down in the P-H-X
She already told me yo ass look like Shrek
You look like lil milo the animal on yo bape hoody
Actin all hard, you even been to the hood B?
Me I was produced by the hood, Im a hood PRODIGY
Your a Dorchester WANNABE
Stop talkin bout dick, cause the only 1 u c is the one you suckin
The only one i see is mine... In yo girl when im fuckin
Still warmin up, wheres the challenge at P-Korny
They call me... Eternity cause i got rhymes foreva
P
lolz yall. if I wuz fukin doods I wulDnt have ta pay no wack azz chiLd suPport for my 9 kids. u like tha ideA of me getTin wit duDes so much teLl yo manly azz momma ta coMe ova ta my spot, lol.
this corny nigga think that he a prodigy
his rhymes is so wack i thought he had a lobotomy
yo lyrics are looser than a 80 year old fag
son I aint got no girlfriend, i jus use yours as a cumrag
"Eternity?" u got me laughin B, who gave u dat wackazz nickname?
Man don't nobody know u, and they dont call u a damn thang
rappin bout suckin dicks all u know about
u tryin ta flirt wit me when Im all about throwin down
u jus a little baby bitch, jus a ghetto pretender
ill knock yo rhymes da fuck out cuz im a contender
but i'll just chill here on myspace, readin another rhyme u mangled
cuz when u step ta my set u get stripped raped and stranged
Him
Haha you got me ppayin your child support
This goes out to all the wack rappers: P-Korny ha
Check it
Ay lemme know what set you claim?
Run up on yo block put ya'll niggas to shame
Bitches takin your ass to court?
Haha they already know, I aint payin no child support
By the way eight of your kids are really mine
And you aint the daddy of baby number nine
In jail, you the nigga that purposely drops the soap
Even a chance im a bitch nigga like you? NOPE
Keep sitting on myspace, and work on your grammar
While i sit at the mirror and look at my glamor
The difference between us is you your a bitch
Ya balls aint even dropped your voice is still hight pitch
My rhymes are tearin you up like a prickly cactus
On the real nigga, this battle is practice
P
haha aight dawg.
yo dis goes out ta General Korn-walis himself, Kyle. Wackazz busta. Awwww yeaa
Yall keep sayin this is practice, well dats real nice
U better practice gettin schooled cuz u gonna get schooled for life
i keepz ownin yo rhymes like I own little kidz
snatch em from tha playground an fill em full of jizz
i break down yo door and kidnap yo little sister
no lube for her cuz I wan it ta hurt when I fist her
I snatch yo whole set up like a kid alone at Toys R Us
Tie em up in a basement an straight up bust a bus
So why don't u an yo biscuithead step off wit ya corny azz shit
Yallz in P-Qwanz hood an u don know who u fuckin wit
Him... after I got bored and didn't write back for like a week
Ay nigga u gon write back? Or are you just puttin another win in my undefeated win column. I dont lose
P
yo daWg yo rhymez is ill, str8 up. heLp ya boi ouT an maIl me a paIr of yo mOmz panTies.
Percy Jenkins
Prisoner Number 8843291
Suffolk County Prison
200 Nashua Rd.
Boston Ma 02144
holLa
Him
My mom said she dont mail stuff to niggas wit sorry rhymes.
But them brown spots in yo mommas tell her i know damn well them aint no chocolate bar stains
Ay do you just rap for fun or are fa real bout it?
P
Yo nigga listen up. I git 5 minuts a day ta do dis innanet thang in hurr b4 they be makin us goto the yaRd. i aint bout to waste iT chiT chattin wit yo azz bout rappin like yaLlz my tAlent aGent n shit. sEnd me them panTies B!
Him
Wit a name like Percy i question if your a boy?
One would think you've learned after you've already been destroyed
Why is yo ass so obsessed wit panties b
When we know your really in the closet dreamin of gay fantasies
I'll run up in yo crib, nut in ya momma face, come back an do it again
Its a shame you cant stopped me, cause you locked in the penn
We both droppin stuff
Me, im droppin rhymes that are doper than dope
You, are in the jailhouse shower droppin the soap
Gettin naked before niggas ask you to strip ya clothes
Ask you gay ask to suck ya dick you reply "I suppose"
Come see me dawg, I'm near the Golden State
If your faggot ass come at me crooken, I'll knock you straight
yo daWg yo rhymez is ill, str8 up. <---- You sent that the other day
well im sendin this to you-----> yo daWg yo rhymez is NOT ill
P
i aint playIn dawg. SEND THEM PANTIES! uthawise imma get my homeboys in tha Eastcide Gorillaz ta chunder yo shit str8 up smug a dug potato pancake azz buttermilk. i aint playin whiteboi.
-It went on like that for a few more messages and I got bored.- |
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A rap battle???? hahahahahahahahaha that was fucking AWESOME. |
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Ok, I'm working on it now. Just so I know, did we totally make up "guzzla," or do people actually say that shit? I'm stealing it either way. |
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As far as I know that is an xmikex creation. We should make a printable chart of rttp-born ghetto slang terms. |
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menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: As far as I know that is an xmikex creation. We should make a printable chart of rttp-born ghetto slang terms. |
Seriously - if enough people use this shit, watch for it on MTV in a month.
Lil' Jon up next, with his smash hit, "2 All My Guzzlas" . |
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i showed my friend this a while back and he got the biggest laugh on how stupid people really are. |
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Yeah I'm pretty sure I coined the term guzzla, but go crazy with it. |
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Ok, I added both you knuckleheads, let's get trollin'. I still need to dumb my page up a little, though. I'll post the link when it's ready for perusal. |
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I can't wait to get a few friends so I can post a bulletin about how Tom from Myspace sent me some racist shit, but I accidentally deleted it. |
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Ok, Twon Carter has made his first image comment. Starting off slow, so I can "get some luv" back. (I found her on HOLLADADDY69's friend list, maybe he can give Twon some good references.)
The picture:
Profile being commented on:
http://www.myspace.com/aarinyah
The comment:
MERKIN NIZZLES IN THA ROX-BIZZLE
une 13, 2007 1:53 PM
-~- gIRL, JU5 L00K AT U 2, LIKE 5UM FLY-A$$ 5T0P LIGHT WITH N0 GR33N LIGHT. IF'N I WUZ 0UT WE55-5IDE, ID EAT U 2 UP LIKE A B0WL 0V SKITTLES WITH JU5 DA LEM0N AND LIME 0NES IN IT, AN 0NLY 1 RED 0NE an 1 0RANGE 1 LEFT! -~- -~- I HATE5 DA LIME 0NES, GU$ GU$ GU$! -~- |
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Comment #2 (this one's a profile comment)
Picture:
Profile commented on ("Danish Gal"):
http://www.myspace.com/danish_gal
The comment:
yeah, YEAH, danish gal, dunka sniz-snaz!! I luv me some CHEESE danish, I kno U kno whut ahm sayin. Pile a DUMPTRUCK up in that bric-a-brac, fo' REAL! Much luv frum tha rox-BIZZLE. |
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Ok, I got enough friends to start sending out bulletins, how's this one for a start:
MERKIN NIZZLES IN THA ROX-BIZZLE
Subject: TOM IS A STRAIGHT UP RACIST
Body YO, CHECK DIS SHIT... ALL MY PEEPS IS LIKE, JOIN MYSPACE, HOS BE UP EVERYWHERE ON YO SUPERTRAGGLES IF YOU B ON MYSPACE, SO I JOIN MYSPACE, AND FIRST TIME OUT DA BOX THAT NICCA TOM SEND ME SOME RACIST BULLSHIT, ALL "PICK MY COTTON, YOU BLACK DEVIL", DIS AND DAT. ID PUT IT IN HERE BUT IM NEW WIT COMPUTERS AND I ERASED IT, BUT CHECK IT, TOM IS A RACIST, DELETE THAT NICCA. HOLLATRON! |
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These people blow me away with the amount of shit they'll let me say to them knowing full well that it doesn't make ANY sense.
COMMENTS THAT HAVE BEEN APPROVED
The Pic:
The Screened AND Approved Comment:
D@mn boo, dats soMe s3rious rapeD on tha altaR shit n shit. nah meen? Yo gurl I wanna do suCh bad thiNgs LOL like maKe yaLL commit sacrilege and haVe yall damned fo eternity tO smell yo owN fLesh Burn but neva be conSumed in tha Flames of tha BurnIng citY of Dis in thA inner ciRcle of the UnderwoRld.
HOLLA!
More to come... |
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Picture of Some Kid's New Girlfriend
The Comment:
aww yeA, hot doGs in spaGetti son LOL feel me?
His Comment back:
wat da hell was dat pose to mean--pepsi
My Comment back Screened and Approved
yo Son son SoN son son, im juS sayIn yaLl hass a butiFul giRlfreInd an sHould be prOud niCCa. cOlostomy boWlingball chIckeNfinG3rs B. stAy up.
- P
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The Girl
fuck cryin,fuck gettin even jus get $
The pic commented on
Image caption:
She go hard LOL
My Comment... not screened by also not deleted
yo she a cutie. she goNna grOw up 2 be a coUntryass guzzla l1ke her moMMa LoL. awwww.
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Some other broad
My comment, screened & approved... why?
buttabiscuit cornflakes like a nell nutta nicca. DAYMM gurl lol.
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xmikex said: cOlostomy boWlingball chIckeNfinG3rs B. stAy up. |
hahahahaha |
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Once again... screened and approved:
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ten sided nigga-hedron? hahahahahahaah |
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I think I need to fuck with the homies again. I've been watching The Wire and have been calling the police knocko's, creepers, and rollies all week yall. |
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xmikex's are what Castledoomerown would be if he was a thugged out black guy. |
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I heard P-Qwan's debut album "Yoo-Hoo Historectomy Nigga, Aiiight?" is due out soon on Universal records. |
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Oh you know how we do. Take it light but take it, you feel me? |
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anyone get any interesting friend requests today? |
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wow this made me laugh so damn hard, I fucking lost it at "captaincrunch bustah" |
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HAHAHA! you're still running this charade? this is by far one of the best uses of spare time I've ever seen, LOL! |
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I forgot how awesome this thread was, haha. |
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So xmikex convinced me to get this thing going again. I'm in Hanson at TYAG practice and have a ton of great shit going.
Rev should fix the code that does the double posting though! <3 |
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One of you guys has GOT to try and join Peer Pressure (those kids that hump the ottoman). |
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menstrual_sweatpants_disco said: xmikex said:Books: i hate readin
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA |
You know what the funny thing is? I didn't make ANY of that up.
Actually, half way through copying this guy's shit, I find out he grew up in Hanson. No shit. Whiman/Hanson Regional High School. Here his real profile: http://www.myspace.com/cvkid |
HAHAHAHAHAHA NICCOLAI AND HAPPYSUNSHINEBABY WENT TO HIGH SCHOOL WITH THIS GUY.
hahah this is the biggest coinsidence ever. In fact, some of the new LongCatBeachKillas shit was inspired by this guy. This is awesome. |
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The real Holladaddy is in walking distance of where I am right now. Even scarier, I've been walking around for the last 2 weeks quoting a line from LongCatBeachKillas that was originially a line from the real Holladaddy. |
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I feel like the results of this study should be submitted to a scientific journal. |
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Yes, the science of hilarity. |
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My assumed identity:
"HollaDaddy"
http://www.myspace.com/holladaddy69
Victim name:
Chrystle Still Loves You... Even The Haters
Profile:
test
Photo:
My message to her:
sup gurl.. i wnana get wit chu
holla
Her response:
well... whats really good wit u ????
Me:
let's get da mack on
Her:
3236277050 THE NAME IS CHRYSTLE WHATS YOURS???LOL
Me:
Chester, gurl. what u into gurl?
Her:
"what am i in to?"...im into alot of things but i dont know what u talkin about ????lol
Me:
It means what do you like to do for fun. Don't you go to the blacktalk meetings? You're a disgrace to our culture.
Her:
well i do all types of things for fun....go to parties, go out wit the homegirls anything fun basically....what about u????and im not a disgrace to our culture nigga!!!!lol
Me:
i'm jus playin gurl... i'm sho u get da pamphlets in da mail n shyt.
so wats fresh gurl.. u got a man right now?
Her:
no i dont have a man right now but i am kinda talkin to somebody but it aint that serius u feel me....but anyways i know u got a gurl????
Me:
nah i aint got no gurl eitha.
an dats a shame, a beautiful thing like you aint got a man, dats hard to believes gurl.
Her:
i know i just havent found the right one yet but im "testing the waters" though...lol but anyways why u dont have a gurl as gud as u look?????
Me:
I have hepatitis. Do you want to meet up?
Her:
if you serius im sorry for u but if u just playin thats not even cool cuz i dont like playin games my nigga...but im straight though if thats what u want....
Me:
nah I ain't playin gurl, but it's coo... i didn't get da hep from gettin freakay wit da ladies, i gots it from heroin so u gots no worries. where u at? we should meet up.
Her:
so u still on drugs or what???...im just asking because i was kinda feelin you and i neva woulda thought u feel me but anyways im close though im in watts
Me:
nah not on da horse anymore gurl. so what's snappin? U gots any heron? i'd suck yo dick fo some of dat right dere.
jubjub |
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I just made rev's code throw up all over itself. |
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what a weird bug.
I found the line of code... I need to refactor it and then update my code. |
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ok, I re-did the code.
not too hard. |
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I want to be gay with you. |
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