|
New site? Maybe some day.
|
The scenario: A 19 year old fat, bisexual Mexican dude from Chelsea tried to pick me up yesterday. Dave and I acted out how it should have gone down via AIM. Bored Composted is bored.
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:13:37 PM): hey sexy american boy, let me snarfle your mayo hose
meamogre (5:13:54 PM): hell yeah let me get yo back wet
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:14:38 PM): can we play bathtub scuba submarine gerbil attack tonight?
meamogre (5:15:01 PM): only if you sing me pickle surprise
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:15:29 PM): i'll sing into your hog like john travolta on meth
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:15:54 PM): i mean, whats pickle surprise
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:15:55 PM): ?
meamogre (5:16:07 PM): go on youtube you stupid spick
meamogre (5:16:09 PM): god
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:16:16 PM): haha LOL
meamogre (5:16:34 PM): don't laugh, i'll fuck your back rolls
meamogre (5:16:41 PM): with a wrench
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:16:58 PM): they unleash a deadly venom when threatened
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:17:13 PM): i like burritos
meamogre (5:17:28 PM): really i like burritos too. we should hang out in chelsea where you don't like it.
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:18:11 PM): i'd like it if you were there. you saucey velaciraptor you
meamogre (5:18:30 PM): you spell like old people fuck. get back on the boat. ELL OH ELL.
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:18:54 PM): my boat was my mom
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:19:17 PM): i took kidnergarten with a devil eagle
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:19:27 PM): eiffel tower
meamogre (5:19:40 PM): hahahahahah what the fuck. you make me cry, bisexual mexican boy
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:20:05 PM): i'll make your weiner cry, barbecue bullets
meamogre (5:20:30 PM): that's about as sexy as christ.
meamogre (5:20:35 PM): if not more
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:20:50 PM): i eat dead lizrd skin
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:20:55 PM): rarrfgghhugjhlkj
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:20:58 PM): chong
meamogre (5:21:22 PM): do you want to party with alcohol and dudez?
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:21:36 PM): oh yesh
meamogre (5:21:52 PM): ok you bring the party i'll bring the dude
meamogre (5:21:54 PM): z
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:21:58 PM): z
meamogre (5:22:03 PM): z
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:22:09 PM): i freestyle rap in my underoos
meamogre (5:22:31 PM): bust a verse, shit brick. if it sucks i'm going to rip off your sweatpants in front of your grandmother.
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:22:34 PM): CAVEMAN BONER!
meamogre (5:22:41 PM): that doesn't even rhyme
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:23:30 PM): JELLY FIST TESTICAL TITS, I WASH MY GRUNDLE WITH A CROCODILE WRIST
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:23:53 PM): BEST WESTERN TURNING TRICKS
meamogre (5:24:00 PM): ::beat boxes::
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:24:10 PM): I LUNGE AT YOUR ANUS WITH A SAUSAGE KISS
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:24:24 PM): I ROCK THE HOUSE LIKE A SINK HOLE
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:24:43 PM): I LAUGH OUT LOUD WHEN I MASTURBATE WITH PIZZA ROLLS
meamogre (5:24:51 PM): this is making me wet
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:25:05 PM): COCAINE IT SEVERS MY BRAIN LIKE SCHAIVO
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:25:20 PM): SO KNOW I'L BE ON TOMORROW WITH A NEW EPISODE
meamogre (5:25:37 PM): awww shit
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:26:00 PM): LOCK DOWN I GOT THIS SHIT ON HOUSE ARREST
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:26:19 PM): WATCH ME LONG DISTANCE RUN WITH A SQUIRREL ON MY CHEST
meamogre (5:26:24 PM): hahahaha
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:26:31 PM): I FELCH DAFFY LIKE DUCK
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:26:38 PM): CUZ I DONT GIVE A FUCK
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:26:58 PM): LET ME RUN OVER CHILDREN WITH A GARBAGE TRUCK
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:27:03 PM): FULL OF SEMEN
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:27:23 PM): I'M DRUG RUNNING WITH NIPPLES BEAMING
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:27:33 PM): BRINGING DOPE TO THE MASSES
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:27:49 PM): SEMEN SOAKED PILLOWS FOR A CUM SMOTHERED ASSES
meamogre (5:27:58 PM): LOL PLURAL
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:28:15 PM): CRACK
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:28:20 PM): YOU KNOW I SMOKE IT
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:28:42 PM): I LOVE THAT SHIT LIKE GERMANS LOVE SHIT
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:28:45 PM): OOH
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:29:07 PM): I ROCK BIG TOES
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:29:15 PM): AND MIDGET HO'S
meamogre (5:29:20 PM): big toes wut
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:29:29 PM): CUM TO MY SHOW AND I'LL LAUGH IN YOUR NOSE
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:29:44 PM): I'M NEVER GONNA GIVE UP
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:30:02 PM): MY COLLECTOR'S EDITION BUTTER CUP
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:30:11 PM): ITS ALL I HAVE LEFT AFTER THE FIRE
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:30:26 PM): YOU KNOW YOUR KINGDOM CALLS ME SURE
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:30:33 PM): *SIRE
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:30:40 PM): WELL I CALL THE BITCHES
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:30:49 PM): I DONT NEED M'S
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:31:04 PM): FUCK A MOTHERFUCKING M LIKE A FUCK YO OTHER
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:31:07 PM): OTHER FUCKER
meamogre (5:31:14 PM): otha otha
meamogre (5:31:45 PM): that'll do faggot. that'll do.
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:31:59 PM): HAHA
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:32:00 PM): AHHH
meamogre (5:32:15 PM): go tell your mother i want some chimichangas and an orangina.
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:32:32 PM): vaginas
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:33:16 PM): cockroach soup
meamogre (5:33:22 PM): hahaha
meamogre (5:33:34 PM): this should go on return to the pit.
meamogre (5:33:42 PM): as if people don't hate us enough on there already.
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:33:43 PM): do it up
|
|
Neither one talks to me ever. You tell me where the hates truly is. |
|
You know Mark, you talk to me for hours about life and all our collective bullshit, but not once, NOT ONCE did you offer to fuck my back rolls with a wrench.
Tease. |
|
Ohhhhh now my stomach hurts from laughing too damn hard.
Thanks, you pricks. |
|
goddamn that is wonderful |
|
Sorry Murph. How would you like to be my toolshed big boy? |
|
|
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:26:31 PM): I FELCH DAFFY LIKE DUCK
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:26:38 PM): CUZ I DONT GIVE A FUCK
TheMetalOfMaggot (5:26:58 PM): LET ME RUN OVER CHILDREN WITH A GARBAGE TRUCK |
Easily the greatest rhyme you've ever written Mr. Maggot. |
|
|
Sorry Murph. How would you like to be my toolshed big boy? |
I would sell my first-born to Ghana if I could obtain a life-sized poster of you wearing nothing but a fully-furnished tool belt.
Perhaps dressed with a 2x4 over your shoulder, winking,
You're like Jim Duggan, but hot. |
|
You sure know how to make a girl blush. |
|
Goddammit, that motherfucker hit on me again tonight. Why won't bisexual Mexican (we'll call him The Bisexican) accept that I do not like dudes and find somewhere else to park his dick? |
|
Hey man, the septum ring is brutal. I could understand if I had a Monroe or a lip piercing. |
|
Oh, so when these fancy daniels on the internet hit on you it's fine as wine, but when I do it's gross? Don't forget who you come home to every night. |
|
I did not say it was fine as wine. I called him a fat, bisexual wetback and berated the principle of his being via IM with Dave Maggot.
I'll always love you Richard, light of my life. |
|
RICH HORROR IS THE SIDE YOUR BREAD IS BUTTERED ON |
[default homepage]
|
[print][ | 4:57:22am Mar 29,2024 load time 0.01193 secs/12 queries] | [search] | [refresh page] |
|