He will send tax relief to the communities surrounding all metal fests in the country, so they can spend more money on his distro to help stimulate the economy.
He will wage war on Sweden for sending us so many horrible 'thrash' bands over the past 2 years. He will then give all the free people of sweden Sin of Angels demo cds.
Mike of Existence could tell you dozens of stories of things I've done that should probably end up on that site. I forget when it was, sometime last year I think, I downed a ton of caffeine pills with a rock star drink. It was fucking weird.
Anyways, ask him in person because I don't think the stories should be posted here.